New Bond Trailer Shows Poker and Eva Green
A new trailer was released for the upcoming James Bond film, Casino Royale, and unlike the last one we wrote about, this one does show Bond playing poker and more importantly it shows much more of Eva Green, the French actress who we'll go out on a limb and say is the hottest Bond girl with 10 toes since Halle Berry, who was the last Bond girl and actually has 11 toes but who's counting?
For those who need a refresher, the new Bond film stars Daniel Craig, an actor who attracts gay men and didn't know how to play poker a few months ago but is now a poker expert which is good because in the movie 007 is saving the world by playing Texas Hold'em instead of Baccarat. You see, evil terrorist financier Le Chiffre sets up a high-stakes poker game at Le Casino Royale to help raise some dough for the world's terrorists, and rumor has it to also produce cheesy reality TV shows for American audiences. So if Bond busts Le Chiffre at the table, his terrorist peeps won't have any money and he will no longer be able to spam Jack Johnson fan forums looking for hot moms. If Bond loses though, he's helping to fund those damn jihadis. Either way though he gets to shag Eva Green, drive a cool car and blow shit up, so at least he has that going for him.
It's worth noting that the movie's target demo must be poker-playin, action-lovin' Bond fans who are gay (not that there's anything wrong with that) because where the last Bond film's trailer showed Halle Berry walking out of the ocean in a bikini, this one has Daniel Craig doing the same in nut-huggers with no Eva Green in sight. Therefore we recommend washing your eyes with this NSFW video of Eva Green after viewing the Casino Royale trailer.