Keeley Hazell Will Be A No Show in Our Hotel Room Tonight

We mentioned earlier today that our favorite top-dropper Keeley Hazell was getting a tad prudish lately and wasn't as prolific as she used to be in dropping the top for men's magazines. And what do you know . . . seconds later we come across a brand spanking new topless photo spread of Keeley in the June issue of Nuts magazine.

It's kind of like the time we reported there was nothing interesting happening in the poker world and then moments later the Fristian facists pulled a Pearl Harbor job by sneaking the UIGEA into the Port Security Bill.

Say one thing, and the exact opposite happens. So . . . we're gonna try our luck with the headline above and hope for the best.

Click photos of Keeley Hazell below for their hi-res, much larger NSFW counterparts.

Keeley Hazell Is Not Playing in the WSOP-C Harrah's New Orleans

No need to beat a dead horse, but the WSOP-C events aren't what they used to be. Smaller fields, buy-ins, pay-outs, and star quality.

So while Keeley Hazell participating in one would certainly give WSOP-C events, like the one going on at Harrah's New Orleans right now, a Gamma-O shot in the arm, for now, we'll have to live with the latest pics of her in a bikini and not on the felt.

Which is actually preferrable.

A respectable 249 runners ponied up the $5k entry for this one, and a few hours into Day 2 only 36 remain. Scanning through the leaderboard, the only name that jumps out is Jonathan Little, stacked at 65,000. He trails chip leader Chuck Keeley Kelley (168,000) and Timothy Miles (155,000).

Get full chip counts and live blogging from Poker News here.

* Thanks to reader shakespear1993 for the new Keely Hazell pics here, here, and here.

Keeley Hazell Not Naked, in Clothes Again

Move along. There is nothing to see here. Yep, our favorite top dropper Keeley Hazell is wearing clothes again, this time at some Rock Band Bowling Evening event. We've seen Keeley covering up the good stuff lately and we're just hoping this isn't a trend. Because Keeley didn't get to be our Official WCP Girl for the last three years by wearing high-waisted jeans. No she earned that distinction by doing this, this, this and this. And this, this, this, this and this. And this. And this.

Keeley Hazell BBC Bikini Photoshoot Video Makes for a Good Post

We didn't have any luck finding a photo of Kathleen Hennessey, but we did find the below video of Keeley Hazell doing some bikini photoshoot on BBC Three in the UK while we were painfully live blogging the WSOP media conference call. So we have that going for us.

We don't really watch Keeley Hazell videos with the volume up, it ruins our focus, especially if she's singing, so we're not quite sure what's up with the photograher dude talking and the young blonde girl with the sort of pudgy face and boobs just kind of staring at Keeley the whole time. Was this some sort of Make a Wish thing for her? If so, we wish her well, and we're glad she lived long enough to see what perfect 32Es look like in person.

Watch the video after the jump . . .

Keeley Hazell is a Singer, Releases "Voyeur" Music Video

Our favorite top-dropper Keeley Hazell is branching out from showing off her perfectly massive natural 32Es in one photo spread after another to showing off her perfectly massive natural 32Es while singing in music videos.

Yep, the British hottie who has been the official Wicked Chops Poker Girl for 3 years running now just released a one-minute music video tease for her new single "Voyeur" (full video available for download May 2), and it's 60 seconds of pure Keeley Hazell goodness as she prances around in barely-there lingerie, works her way around a stripper pole and dances in front of two other half-naked chicks on a bed.

If you're curious if the song is any good or if Keeley Hazell can actually sing, then re-read the sentence above about Keeley in lingerie, a stripper pole and two other chicks and ask yourself if you really care. If you answer yes, go here.

Watch the video:



Keeley Hazell "Voyeur" music video

Remember when Keeley Hazell wasn't doing the singing but just "doing" the pop stars who sang? Relive those days below:

Keeley Hazell as Jennifer Lopez and Jessica Simpson
Keeley Hazell as Madonna
Keeley Hazell as Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera

Keeley Hazell 2008 Calendar Bikini Photo Outtake Makes for a Good Post

The bikini-busting photo of Keeley Hazell you're about to see after the jump doesn't require much set up except to say that it just might be the hottest photo we've seen of Keeley in awhile (or at least a few days) and somehow it didn't make the cut for one of the numerous calendars she did for 2008.

Yes, as we mentioned before, the girl's prolific.

Click "continue" below for the full pic in all its glory, and for other great moments in Keeley Hazell busting out of a bikini history go here, here, here, here and here.

The Wicked Chops Poker Awards - Part III

As promised, the last part of our Wicked Chops Poker Awards is below and ready to go. Read Part I here and Part II here.

Part III is brought to you by Rosie Huntington-Whiteley (at right). Rosie, a Brit, is a Victoria's Secret model billed as the next Kate Moss. Except she's much hotter than Kate Moss and less of a junkie. At least less of one for now.

Best Online Poker Site for Talking Shit: Bodog. Not sure why, but if you're a good shit-talker and like getting under people's skin, Bodog is the place for you to rage. F***ing luckboxes.

Best Online Poker Site for All-In Fests: Full Tilt Poker. If we're looking to get a Kate Moss-esque quick fix and don't have a lot of time to waste, Full Tilt's turbo SNG's basically turn into push monkey all-in fests after the first level or two. Perfect little bump.

Best Online Poker Site if You Like Pictures of Children and Dogs: Poker Stars. We love Poker Stars. We don't like other people's kids or dogs. Somebody needs to conduct a study to determine the percentage of runners on Stars that use a baby/family/dog photo for their icon. We're guessing at least 20%. Gotta be.

Best Poker Blogger Trip Reporter: Kid Dynamite. We keep saying it, but Kid Dynamite is the most under-rated poker blogger out there. And we'll keep saying it until he becomes over-rated and hated. His trip reports are particularly good. Read his latest batch here, here and here.

Keeley Hazell is Prolific

The way Keeley Hazell pleasures us with one photo shoot after another is a big reason why she holds the pole position as the Official Wicked Chops Poker Girl of 2008.

It's like Keeley is some sort of modern day Józef Ignacy Kraszewski, except instead of writing hundreds of novels in a language that makes no sense to us, she prolifically drops the top for men's magazines around the world on a monthly, if not weekly, basis.

Yeh, we have no idea who Józef Ignacy Kraszewski is either but we're running out of things to say about the world's most perfectly built woman and Józef Ignacy Kraszewski's name is really, really long and we were looking to fill in some space here so the text matches up with the photo you see on the right of Keeley Hazell in the May issue of the UK edition of FHM magazine.

Ok we're good. Now, check out more deliciously clickable photos of Keeley Hazell from the new FHM spread below and here.

Relatedly, find out how you can get interactive with Keeley here, see her in chocolate bikini here and reminisce about her first spread of 2008 here

Keeley Hazell is Interactive

Our favorite top-dropper Keeley Hazell is at again.

FHM is letting its readers pick the Top 100 Sexiest Women in the World and has launched an interactive "Lady Selector" web page in which Keeley helps you choose your favorite hotties by dressing and looking exactly the way you want her to and then sharing with you some of the famous girls who match that criteria.

For example, you can tell Keeley you want her to be a brunette, American girl-next-door type with a nice ass and like magic, although not creepy like magic, Keeley is a brunette, American girl-next-door type with a nice ass. She then tells you some of the girls who match that look, like, say, Jessica Alba.

Yep, it's a genius concept, and a total time sucker. So clear your afternoon and start interacting with Keeley here.

Other great moments in Keeley Hazell doing the fantasy dress up/dress down thing:

Keeley Hazell as a WWII pin up girl
Keeley Hazell as a Simpson character
Keeley Hazell as Audrey Hepburn
Keeley Hazell as Jennifer Lopez and Jessica Simpson
Keeley Hazell as Madonna
Keeley Hazell as Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera

Keeley Hazell in FHM Australia Brings You Today's Poker News

Our featured poker news today is brought to you by Keeley Hazell's recent photo spread in FHM Australia. Got poker news to share, shoot us an email.

:: Guy loses his job, starts underground poker game in his home, pimps his wife as a topless dealer, gets arrested (Click here)

:: Jeff Haney of the Las Vegas Sun handicaps the field for the upcoming 2008 NBC National Heads-Up Poker Championship (Click here)

:: Oi, Vai! Some shlemiel politician in Israel has the chutzpah to propose a bill that would force internet providers to block online gambling sites (Click here)

:: The Poker Players Alliance spent $900,000 lobbying the government last year on behalf of online poker, which is legal (Click here)

:: Mike McMillian grabs $168,000 for winning the main event of the Venetian's Deep Stack Extravaganza (Click here)

:: A poker home game in San Antonio, the city loved by Richard Lee even though it's a craphole, was shot up and robbed, a player was critically injured, and the Pokerati crew is on the story (Click here)

The entities are in LA and Las Vegas this week for the WPT LA Poker Classic, WPT Invitational and the NBC Heads-Up Poker Championship. Keep posted of all the action here.

Click Keeley Hazell photos below. Dos mas after the jump . . .

Keeley Hazell Wishes You a Happy Valentines Day

Our favorite top-dropper Keeley Hazell lipsticked her undies to wish her fans a Happy Valentine's Day today. You can put that down as reason #147 for why Keeley Hazell is our OWCPG for two years running and a shoo-in in 2008. Check out the NSFW version over at Page3.com. Related: Keeley Hazell in a Chocolate Bikini Keeley Hazell in ZOO Bikini Photo Spread Keeley Hazell is 21 Today Keeley Hazell Does Jessica Simpson and J-Lo Photos

Keeley Hazell in Chocolate Bikini by the Tower Bridge Photos Makes for a Good Post

Just when we were considering someone else like Odette Yustman as a candidate for the OWCPG of 2008, Keeley Hazell, the OWCPG for two years running, does her thing again. This time it's a bunch of completely untouched photos of her wearing just a chocolate-color bikini while standing in front of the Tower Bridge in London. Apparently the shots are for Lynx body spray which we here in the U.S. know as Axe, the stuff that, like our incredible charm and magical penises, makes the girls go crazy wild for you. The guys made out of chocolate holding up the body spray, we didn't notice them. Click on the photos of Keeley Hazell below for all their goodness, and a few more after the jump.

Keeley Hazell's Zoo Weekly Bikini photos Keeley Hazell FHM bikini photos Keeley Hazell not quite all the way in a bikini (NSFW)

April Scott Video at Jet Las Vegas Makes for a Good Post

Like Keeley Hazell, we're not used to seeing model/actress April Scott wearing much more than nothing. But there she was the other night in Las Vegas at Jet in the Mirage wearing some purple-y silky dressy kind of thing that went up to her neck that can best be described as what we just described.

Scott, who is distinguished as the first girl we ever featured on Wicked Chops Poker back in 2005, was celebrating her 2008 Calendar release and in the video looks a lot like a hot, younger, waify-er version of Denise Richards. As the video above doesn't give you a whole lot of April, check out the links below and more than a handful of new photos of April Scott after the jump . . .

April Scott 2008 Calendar Release in Las Vegas Video

Friday Night Parting Shot: April Scott

April Scott as Daisy Duke Makes for a Good Post

Keeley Hazell in Clothes?

Keeley Hazell Busts Out New Bikini Photo Spread

Keeley Hazell reminded us once again why she's been the Official Wicked Chops Poker Girl for the last two years running and why she just may make a 32E-peat in 2008. Only a few weeks into the year and already our favorite massively natural breasted Brit hottie is doing what she does best, posing half naked for photos, this time in ZOO Magazine. And according to her interview*, Keeley is resolved to do even more photoshoots this year and says she is planning to release a book. The subject: her body. It's this type of commitment to shamelessly appeal to our prurient interests with one hot photo spread after another that makes it virtually inconceivable for some other girl to come along and unseat Keeley Hazell from her pole position at Wicked Chops Poker this year. Still, all options are currently being considered as we pick the OWCPG of 2008, and we encourage you to submit suggestions, futile as they may seem. If there's one thing we learned from Orel Hershiser being picked for NBC Heads-Up Poker and a frog riding a motorcycle, anything can happen. Anything. Photos of Keeley Hazell in ZOO Magazine after the jump. * Yep, we read the interview.

Yum

Watch Denise Pernula's interview with Layla Kayleigh.
We always wondered what the fantastically hot Layla Kayleigh would look like wearing nothing but boots and a silky pillow case and low and behold, that's exactly what she wore this New Year's Eve. The photo to the right is one of the pics from the night (click to enlarge). There's another you can see over at Layla's MySpace page.

Also, the Season 6 World Poker Tour hostess released a video blog a few weeks ago from her hotel room in Chicago which you can view below. This time, unlike last time, Layla Kayleigh's actually wearing a watch, and at one point, a big ball on her head. We suck at multi-tasking so we're not quite sure what she was saying during the video while we were staring at her cleavage but we think she said something about wanting someone to sleep in her bed with her because she's scared of ghosts. Or maybe she was talking about Islamo-fascist terrorism in Pakistan being a vestige of the West's short-sighted Cold War policies. No clue.

Speaking of British girls with amazing breasts, Keeley Hazell is starting 2008 off with a bang, if a bang means another set of scandalously sexy photos that will get you fired if you open them at work. Check the new Keeley Hazell photos out here (NSFW).

Layla Kayleigh in Chicago Dec 2007

Friday Night Parting Shot: Keeley Hazell Shows Her Breasts Again

Thanks to reader Brian late this afternoon for the link to new Keeley Hazell photos on egotastic.com where she is, amazingly, topless.

How Keeley, our official WCP Girl of 2007, hasn't won a Nobel Prize for something by now is beyond us. Peace Prize. Boob Prize. Breast Prize. Titty Prize. Any of the big Nobel Prizes.

The photo at right from her latest spread is the only one we can post.

More NSFW pics here.

All right what the hell, a couple of the NSFW ones after the jump too.

UPDATE: Tossing curves at us like she's Lefty Gomez, if that analogy makes any sense, Keeley Hazell has released not one, but two Official 2008 Keeley Hazell calendars. While we already knew about and previously linked to one of the calendars, which surprisingly has her enormi-boobs covered up in every photo, there is a newly hyped one that is being billed as X-rated. Check out some of the photos from this "X-rated" version calendar here. For somewhat crappy scans of all the photos from both calendars go here.

Some Things We're Thankful For...Part II...The Joanna Krupa 2008 Calendar

A lot of people ask us, they say, "Entities, we're truly thankful for all of the hot girls you post on this site. From being the first to showcase April Scott and of course Keeley Hazell, to nailing the MAXIM hometown hottie," and then they eventually get to the question part, "But Entities, could you please give us more pictures of Joanna Krupa? After all, she was the Official WCP Girl of 2006 and stuff. And she plays poker, like at the 2006 WSOP Main Event. I mean, seriously, please? Also, can I buy some meth from you?"

Listen, we haven't forgotten about Joanna Krupa at all. And we stopped selling meth four hours ago. But Krupa couldn't be any more top-of-mind. When she announced that she was releasing a 2008 calendar (something even one of our favorite sites emailed us about), we didn't even wait to make it a Parting Shot. We put that shit up right away.

The calendar is officially out now, and Krupa threw a party at JET Nightclub in Vegas last night to promote it. She was interviewed by the also hot Andrea Tiede about it, where she reveals that yes, she's still playing poker. And that there's a topless version of the calendar.

Watch the interview below or here. Read about the red carpet here. Buy the calendar here. And get some pics from the interview after the jump.

Joanna Krupa 2008 Calendar Makes for a Good Post

Joanna Krupa is making up for her disappointing no-show at this year's World Series of Poker.

The Poland-born supermodel and occasional poker player with perhaps the finest body in all of Christendom is living up to her "I'd rather go naked" mantra by dropping the top for her 2008 calendar. It's pants-down the best we've seen from the class of 2008 and that's saying a lot considering she's up against the likes of Keeley Hazell, Vikki Blows (NSFW) and Gemma Atkinson.

After the jump, check out a few of the more modest months from her 2008 calendar as well as a video from the photo shoot.

Poker News that Has Absolutely Nothing to Do with Absolute Poker Scandal

:: The inaugural US Poker Bowl featuring a bunch of pros representing a bunch of teams in a bunch of conferences playing a bunch of tournaments is underway at the Palms in Las Vegas. Someone dumb this down for us. [CardPlayer.com] :: Emily Scott, the Keeley Hazell of Australia, has very talented boobs. [Maxim UK] (NSFW and worth the sign up) :: Some well-known but maybe not well-liked US American poker players are crossing the pond to play in the Great British Poker Tour. [PokerListings.com] :: If there's one thing we learned from all of our Adriatic yachting excursions, Croatian woman are great lovers, if you pay them enough, and Nina Moric would be worth every damn kuna. [DoubleViking.com] :: The Duchess, owned by Jason Flemyng from the movie Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, is just one of the pubs taking part in the Ladbrokes Poker Pub series. [UK PokerNews.com] :: Hey look! It's that hot Croatian Nina Moric again. This time even hotter. [Maxim UK] :: We're fans of shyster and Harvard Law professor Alan Dershowitz, and not just because he wants to bomb the fuck out of the Ayatollahs. We also like him because he think it's ridiculous to call either poker or sports betting a game of chance. [Boston Herald] :: If you've ever wonder what Keeley Hazell looked like covered head to toe in clothes, you're dumb. But here you go. [RateThisHottie.com] :: Giving credit where credit is due, MySpace "Friends" whore Tila Tequila has yet to enter the world of midget porn as we expected and is instead bidding for online gaming domination with her own online casino and poker site. Maybe she can hire AJ Green to manage her operations. [TilaCasino.com] :: We'll have to remember Casey Batchelor the next time we do a JC Tran has spectular breasts post. [HornyOyster.com]

Speaking of Poker News

:: With the possible deportation of poker pro Shawn Sheikhan to Iran, RawVegas.tv put together a touching video tribute of the whiny little bitch. [RawVegas.tv] :: Speaking of video, Keeley Hazell finally does one without dropping the top. If hosting this cable-access-quality online show about computers is her next career move, she needs a new manager. [ByteMeTV.com] :: In a move sure to please spaghetti-eatin' poker players from Turin to Trapani, the Italian government is expected to define poker as a game of skill sometime next week. [PokerNews.com] :: Speaking of Italian, Giorgia Palmas is handsdown the hottest one we've seen in the past cinque minuti. [Bastardly.com] (NSFW) :: PokerStars.com's clampdown on online poker ranking sites has pros like Scott Fischman talking. [CardPlayer.com] :: Speaking of clampdown, we're putting an end to these segues with a bikini-licious video of Brazil's hottest swimsuit model since the last one, Isabeli Fontana. [Heavy.com] :: Owen Laukkanen and Lance "The Biz" Bradley can stop playing Scrabulous on Facebook and start playing poker thanks to two really smart guys. [PokerListings.com] :: Katie Downes, Rhian Sugden, Louise Cliffe and Imogen Gray apparently forgot to pack their bikini tops when they went to Ibiza. [Maxim UK] (NSFW) :: Freakonomic's author Steven Levitt reveals in his latest blog post that he is working with an online poker site to catch cheaters. Which one it is, we don't know but we're guessing it isn't Absolute Poker. [Freakonomics.blogs.nytimes.com]

Keeley Hazell is 21 Today

Further proof that the world has yet to change since Annette Obrestad, a woman 5 foot nothing teenage girl, bested the world's top poker players to win the WSOPE Main Event, Keeley Hazell has found her way onto Wicked Chops Poker again. This time it's because the British glam model is celebrating her 21st birthday today, which means she's about two years away from being too old for us and maybe six or seven years away from gravity doing some serious damage to her impossibly natural 32Es.

Fuckin' gravity.

While turning 21 isn't much of a milestone in Keeley Hazell's home land of England, where we understand 8 year old kids can get pissed drunk in pubs and bet on the horses at Newmarket, it does mean Keeley can now freely drink, gamble and get into clubs in Las Vegas. So we're expecting a visit soon.

Until then, you can celebrate Keeley Hazell's birthday by clicking the photo on the right for the half-birthday suit NSFW version. Also one more new photo after the jump. Ok, make that two.

Janne Lamsa Not As Good Looking as Keeley Hazell Pics From Last Post, Is Day 1a Chip Leader at WSOPE Main Event

The second biggest thing going on across the pond today (the first being Keeley Hazell's new spread) was the 2007 WSOPE Main Event.

Day 1a just wrapped with Fin Janne Lamsa (at right) as chip leader, stacked at 115,850. Lamsa has two previous cashes in "major" tournament play in Helsinki.

Lamsa is followed by Huseyin Yilmaz (99,575), whose name sounds like some kind of Arabic alien. Also among the chip leaders are Phil Hellmuth (82,825), somebody named Andrew Feldman (76,650), who we have confirmed is NOT this Andrew Feldman, and somebody named Joseph Serock (60450), who we have confirmed is NOT Joe Sebok.

Day 1b starts tomorrow at 2pm London time, which is around math math math EST and math math math PST.

Get full chip counts and live blogging from PokerNews.com here.

Keeley Hazell Would Be Just as Hot 65 Years Ago

In what may be the hottest set of photos Keeley Hazell has ever done since her last set of photos, our all-time favorite girl with God-given 32Es posed as a World War II era pin-up for a campaign promoting EA Sports' new game Medal of Honor: Airborne. "I've always loved the sexy style of the 1940s and it was great fun to dress up as one of the forces sweethearts and get to play the new Medal of Honor game too!," Keeley Hazell told The Sun, after likely being paid six figures for the gig. By the way, looking at the photos of Keeley Hazell as a WWII pin-up girl, we can't help but to think that our soldiers got robbed when it came to hot chicks to think about when storming beaches and gunning down "Nips" and "Krauts." Especially considering that Betty Grable was the number one pin-up back in the 1940s. Number one average chick with decent legs and a pancake butt maybe but today she wouldn't even catch our eye on a Sunday night at Body English in Vegas, unless perhaps she was kissing another chick like the girl in this RawVegas.tv video. Photos of Keeley as a WW II pin-up after the jump . . .

Yesterday's Poker News Today + Obligatory Distractions

:: Depending on who's telling the story, Antonio Esfandiari's ridiculously named Rocks & Rings posse may or may not have out done Kobe Bryant in ordering $1500 bottles of Cristal during the opening night of the Wynn's new club Blush. [AlwaysBluff.com, TMZ] :: The miniscule-ly built Eva Longoria sometimes does it for us, sometimes not. It's safe to ass-ume that this time she does. [Hollywood Tuna] :: The World Series of Poker Europe officially kicks off tomorrow with a press conference featuring two of poker's most entertainingly obnoxious characters, Phil Hellmuth and David "Devilfish" Ulliott. [WorldSeriesofPoker.com] :: Photos of actress Maggie Gyllenhall wearing Agent Provocateur lingerie is very confusing to our penises. [WWTDD.com] :: The IRS will soon require US casinos and cardrooms to withhold 25% from any cash wins over $5,000. Bitches. [PokerListings.com] :: The heavenly stacked Keeley Hazell is back with a new cover spread in Zoo Weekly. [TVShark.com] :: Stepping up to the big leagues, Caesars Palace is hosting a $10,000 buy-in tournament this October with a $1 million guaranteed first prize that isn't a WSOP Circuit or WPT event. [Las Vegas Sun] :: Listen, we like our girls to be wise, mature and at least of drinking age, except replace "wise" and "mature" with "morally loose" and "foolish" and somewhere in between lies the truth. Anyway, we forget where we were going with this but it had something to do with 18-year-old singer/actress Vanessa Hudgens on a beach in Hawaii. [F-Listed.com] :: Anyone who thinks Harrah's handles the poker media badly should read Change 100's post about the mess that was the EPT Barcelona Open. [Pot Committed] Got something newsworthy to share? Send us your links.

Flight of the Poker News