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Poker Writers: Fold, Call or Raise?

In early position, Rounders co-writer Brian Koppelman leads out with a pot size bet, requesting all sports writers to stop using poker metaphors. Bill "The Sports Guy" Simmons looks as if he's going to flat call, but sensing weakness, fires off a sizable raise.

"Make it no more poker columns and glorifying poker players to go," he declares.

Next to act is The Fool's Jeff Hwang, a player known for expertly taking stock of the situation. Without hesitation, Hwang calls, saying, in his best Teddy KGB accent, "May the poker writers' bubble burst." He then turns to the financial market writers riding the rail and hollers, "Lay off the clichés, you wisenheimers."

Now the action is on you, poker writer. What's your play?

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After staring into the sports and stock writers' souls, I take off my sunglasses and Party Poker hat.

"Y'know, gentlemen," I tell them, "Along with poker, stocks and sports have to be the top three professions ranked by how much more the participants make than the journalists."

"I'm all in."


thanks for not raising your nuts

Joe Speaker

I'm going to vaue call my nuts.

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