The TOKE: Ellenbecker is a poser, Woods is a p*ssy, + Last Call has No Class

:: If Kleis jumped off a bridge would Ellenbecker?  Future President Phil Gordon has made headlines by backing St. Cloud’s Dave Kleis for mayor.  Kleis’s opponent, incumbent John Ellenbecker, has apparently got a case of the “Me too’s!!!”  In an interview with the St. Cloud Times (circulation: 4), Ellenbecker reveals that “something most people don't know” about him, is, get this…are you ready???…he “regularly play(s) Texas Hold'em poker with a group of friends on Friday nights” and has “been playing a couple of years now.”  In related news, next week Ellenbecker is going to a Franz Ferdinand concert (although he’s never heard of them), buying a t-shirt, and wearing it around the office the very next day.  St. Cloud Times

:: Maybe it’s time to take up Solitaire.  This is worse than checking quad 3’s on the river.  According to last week’s Parade Magazine (you know, that flimsy insert in your Sunday paper), James Woods has…hold on…laughing too hard…can’t type…ok ok…nope…not yet…can’t…stop…laughing, “injured himself playing his favorite sport: poker.”  Oh man it gets worse.  Apparently, this is because he’s, “leaning against gaming tables [and] compressed a nerve in his elbow and needed neurosurgery.”  Neurosurgery.  Maybe he’ll hire a stunt double for his next tourney.  Parade

:: Hopefully Last Call Poker will be 6-feet under soon.  Just when you think humanity can't sink any lower, along comes Last Call Poker to prove that yes, it still can.  As reported by OddJack, online site Last Call Poker employed a guerrilla marketing campaign called Tombstone hold’em.  The gist is this: players run around a cemetery (you know, a sacred place where loved ones are buried) “scanning gravestones for their shape, the date of death and the number of people memorialized.” You then build hand ranks based on combinations of what you found. Of course, you ended up with dumb kids playing cards and leaving messes on people’s graves.  Morons.  SF Gate 

Comments

[snake]

poker is dangerous. I was playing a tourney in shreveport and some drunk fool fell off the step behind me and crashed into the back of my chair with all his weight, giving me whiplash, 3 broken vertebrae and a slight concussion...well ok, nothing really happened to me but he did give me a jolt as I looked at my pocket jacks and he made himself the fool of the poker room for about 2 hours as he dropped his rack of chips twice on the floor. this by the way was at about noon on sunday.