Cover Your Raise with Kimono Condoms
Snake: Chops, u ever see this commercial?
Chops: No.
Snake: Got anything funny to say about it?
Chops: Hmm, I can't think of any implied poker terminology that would be appropriate here.
Raise?
All-in?
Big Stack?
None work in this context.
Snake: Yeh I'm stumped too. Hey, don't the actors kind of look like porn stars? I mean the cheesy string bettin dude who goes all in has a ponytail. Isn't there a classic Socratic syllogism that goes:
All actors who have ponytails are porn stars.
This actor has a ponytail.
This actor is a porn star.
Chops: I'm not sure what male porn stars look like from the waist up.
Snake: Hey get this, the president of this condom company says, "Kimono is the choice for sophisticated young-adults; an important part of their wardrobe is the condom they wear."
Chops: You know, I was wondering when wearing a condom as an accessory would catch on. Been doing it for years. Hopefully the same will happen soon for my next favorite dick accessory, the cock-ring.
Snake: Btw, I'm using this email exchange for the post, in lieu of giving any more details about this ad..
Cool?
Chops: Daddy likey.
I'm "Daddy" in the context of the above sentence, fyi.
Use that, it's gold.
And use the fact that I said, "Use that, it's gold."
It's gold.
That was really upsetting. Kid Rock is no longer Kid Rock to me. From here on out, he's Bob.
Posted by: Bones | February 17, 2006 at 08:42 AM
and since we're talking porn the new Scott Sapp (i think he was some Jesus like character in a bad 90s rock band that released the same song, disguised as a different song, over and over to radio) and Kid Rock sex tape is out.
Boy that sounds fantastic. Sapp and Kid together on one sex tape.
Alrighty.
check out a quasi NSFW clip here and puke in your mouth when Scott says its great to be king.
Posted by: snake | February 16, 2006 at 02:36 PM
Snake, I'm afraid you're correct: I was a bad actor with a bad ponytail and my only co-star in my porn career was a box of Kleenex.
So, in conclusion, I think this means your syllogism is legitimate.
I'm glad we had this discussion. I think...
Posted by: Bones | February 16, 2006 at 02:17 PM
yeh i know...its a bit of a flawed syllogism as Lorenzo Lamas always had a pony tail and he didnt do porn./ altho he isn't much of an actor either. perhaps all actors who have ponytails are bad actors and/or do porn. Seems to work. I mean you had a ponytail and acted in high school yet don't act now. so that means you must have been a bad actor...or did porn.
as far as chops tells me, dong size isn't a variable.
Posted by: snake | February 16, 2006 at 01:20 PM
I used to have a pony tail, and I was in drama club in high school. So, as long as the size of your dong isn't a variable, I guess I used to be a porn star. I bet I really enjoyed it, too. Thanks Wicked Chops Poker!
Posted by: Bones | February 16, 2006 at 12:52 PM
that's gold!
Posted by: flog | February 16, 2006 at 11:33 AM