Create-A-Headline: Mock Headlines for LAPC Winner
Sports headlines are horribly predictable and unimaginative.
And poker is not immune from this unimaginativepredictableness.
For every, "Tiger Lurking" (golf), "Yao-za!" (basketball if Yao Ming goes for 30 and 15), or "Bonds Away!" (if Barry launches three moon shots into McCovey Cove), there's the a "Back-to-Back Flack" poker equivalent.
So with that in mind, in what may or may not become a regular feature on Wicked Chops Poker, let's prep some potential headlines for the eventual WPT LAPC winner. And if you have any suggestions, please, comment them below. We will use the best submitted headline for the eventual winner. Yes, you heard right. And if you have a site, we will link to you as well, gaining you valuable access to our passive-aggressive reader base. If you don't have a site, we'll just post your name or something. And Sammy, if it's you, Chops will superimpose his head on something embarrassing and publish it in your honor. To get your creative juices stirring, here's some potential horrible and deplorable starters from WCP:
Per Our Conversation: Ummer Wins LAPC
David Chiu Chews Up the Competition, Wins LAPC
The Hit is On: Galajian Takes WPT Title
Get the gist? Have at it...
LAPC RAIDED BY LAPD captured LIVE ON FOX-TV..MONEY THEN STOLEN BY IRS
Posted by: ChicagoSlims | February 22, 2006 at 09:23 PM
Ok, these are gonna suck really bad...
"Yippie Kie-A Mother Fucker" - McClain wins the LAPC
Woo Lets the Dogs Out. Leads the Pack to Victory
Goehring, Goehring, Gone! Alan Goehring claims LAPC victory
...and finally...
Simmons Semens All Over Competition. Comes Out Ahead.
Posted by: Bones | February 20, 2006 at 08:13 PM
You 'Tran' Do It Man
'Woo' Can Do It Man
'Chiu' Can Do It Man (asian names are fun)
Nothing Better than a 'Ummer' at the LAPC
McClain the Big Mac at the Classic
Don't Sweat it Richard, KISS it goodbye Gene, Steven is the New Simmons in Town (i love how awfully bad this one is)
Goeh'Ring Around the Roses, A Pocket Full of . . . Cash
Daniel Doesn't Quach Under Pressure, Takes the LA Poker Classic (hey thats better than 'If he Walks Like a Duck and Quachs like A duck, he aint no Duck he's Daniel the LA poker Classic Champ)
Posted by: toopid | February 20, 2006 at 07:36 PM
Bummer! LAPC Won By Per Ummer
Posted by: BIC | February 20, 2006 at 06:24 PM
Snake Strikes Again As He Rattles His Opponents and Slithers Through the Field
oh yeh, i'm not there.
Posted by: snake | February 20, 2006 at 03:53 PM
Some Quach Wins the LAPC Title
This Oldie Isn't Sweating: Simmons Captures LAPC
Goehring, Goehring, Gone! Alan Snags LAPC Title
LAPC Track: All Aboard the JC Tran
It's Okay to Spell Kevan with an "a" When You Win the LAPC
Michael Woo's the Competition Over to an LAPC Title
McClain McBurgles the Competition to McWin the LAPC
LAPC Kitty Goes to Per"ring" Ummer
Anahit Punches His Way to the Top of the LAPC Standings
Ah Chiu: God Bless the Latest LAPC Winner
Posted by: Bangs | February 20, 2006 at 12:02 PM