WPT Borgata Poker Classic: Gavin Griffin Beats David "The Big Dragon" Tran

Dare we say...that Gavin Griffin...is...a dragon slayer*?

Gavin Griffin took down his second major tournament of the past year today by winning the WPT Borgata Poker Classic. Griffin won the EPT Grand Final in April of last year.

Adding another $1,401,109 to his coffers, Griffin defeated David "The Big Dragon" Tran** for the title.

The rest of the final table shook down like this: 3) Thomas Hare $381,137, 4) Noah Schwartz $331,958, 5) Lee Watkinson $282,779, and 6) Ervin Prifti $233,600.

Get full payouts here.

* No real dragons slayed in this post. ** Not a real dragon.

Martina Stella is a Hot Girl from Italy Which is in Europe Which is Where the EPT German Open Is Being Led by a Frenchman

The above headline pretty much sums up what we've learned during the past 13 and a half minutes on the Internet. Well that and how to survive a freestyle rap battle and that watching some mentally ill pop star lose her shit every single day isn't as much fun as we thought it would be. Don't get us wrong, it's fun, just not as fun as we thought.

Going beyond the headline though, Day 2 is underway at the EPT German Open in Dortmund, Germany, and Daniel Negreanu is among the top ten in chips with 59,900. WSOPE Main Event champion Annette Obrestad, a woman, is not far behind with 50,200.

Leading the field is some French guy named Chabot Cyrille who's stacked at 111,110, followed by Italian Claudio Rinaldi (71,300).

The rest of the 149 players left on Day 2 consist of people with ridiculous names like Peyman Mohammadzadeh, Jioí Kulhánek, Korosh Mollaie, Szikrai Istvàn, Nazim Kicik, Yngne Anderberg and Jarkko Paasisalo.

We're guessing Rekop Spohc Dekciw, the legendary Scandinavian tennis player, didn't play the event.

Finally, Martina Stella, who has nothing to do with the EPT German Open and who has been mentioned on this site briefly before, is a reprehensibly hot Italian actress and model who you may remember from her small role in Ocean's Twelve. Jog your memory with more photos of Martina Stella plus a video of her dancing on a stage after the jump.

Live updates from the EPT German Open from PokerListings.com's Owen Laukkanen here.

WPT Borgata Poker Classic: David "The Big Dragon" Tran Not a Real Dragon Either

Apparently, the chip leader at the WPT Borgata Poker Classic, David "The Big Dragon" Tran*, is a protege of last year's Card Player POY, David "The Dragon" Pham**.

We definitely believe that the poker world needs more dragons***, so if David "The Big Dragon" Tran**** will be on the scene for awhile, that's a good thing.

See an interview with David "The Big Dragon" Tran***** with WCP fave Kimberly Lansing below.

* Not a real dragon. ** Also not a real dragon. *** So long as they're not real dragons. **** Still not a real dragon. ***** See previous.

Shawn Sheikhan May Have Been a Bit of a Perv 12 Years Ago

Gambling911.com, the Chris Hansen of the online gaming world, is reporting today on the salacious details surrounding Shawn Sheikhan's 1995 conviction for sexual harrasment and battery, which led to 9 months in jail for Sheiky and his deportation hearing last fall.

According to a November 11, 1995 Contra Costa Times article dug up by the blog Perverted Primates, the girls involved were customers of the store Sheikhan managed and that was owned by his family.

The girls testified that Sheikan, 26, repeatedly asked them for sex, and became increasingly aggressive after they turned him down. Eventually, he began physically pulling them onto his lap and demanding hugs. In one incident, he put his hands down the younger girl's pants, she said.

"I felt like a piece of meat," she said. "We felt we should stand up for ourselves. I had nightmares about him, and I didn't want other people to have to go through this."

The two girls were 16 and 17 at the time.

In his defense, Sheiky, who was on NBC's Poker After Dark earlier this month, argued what we always argue when we do something illegal, saying it was "all just a big misunderstanding."

"When I first opened the store, we had tons of girls and guys who wanted to hang out and be part of something. All day long I would have to hear what guys they wanted to be with. . . they were constantly talking about sex," said Sheiky at the time.

Sheiky allegedly tried to persuade the two girls to have sex in exchange for a skateboard, something he admitted doing but said "was all a big joke."

When asked to comment on the above, one of the entities here at Wicked Chops Poker replied, "We can't make any jokes about this as that would be totally inappropriate considering the charges. But we will say that the three of us each own a couple of skateboards. Wink, wink.

Ok, just kidding.

Email us."

Full story at Gambling911.com

Boris Becker, a Ginger, Plays Not Playing EPT German Open Today

See that photo to the right? That's Boris Becker, a man without a soul. A creepy, scary guy who can make you feel queasy just by the sight of him. A ginger.

Now we could argue whether or not gingers should be able to breathe the same air as us or play the game of poker, or at the least, compete in non ginger-only events, but we'll save that for another day.

What we will say though is that PokerStars.com, the online poker site that is sponsoring Becker, is recklessly exploiting his gingervitis with that promo shot to the right. Shit, even if Becker wasn't a ginger, he still looks creepy, scary and soulless in that pic. Combine that with the fact that he is indeed a ginger, and well, let's just say we're glad we're not anywhere near Dortrum, Germany today where Boris Becker, a ginger, is among the field of Day 1b players at the European Poker Tour German Open.

Wait...just checking PokerListings.com right now and it appears Boris Becker was a no show due to an "unexplained illness [that] has kept him from making the trip to Dortmund."

Unexplained illness?

We think we know what that may be. Too bad there isn't a cure.

Anyway, we ironically have a day of Wii Tennis ahead of us so we have to run. Stay tuned to PokerListings.com where you can keep track of today's action, including the play of poker pros Daniel Negreanu, Bertrand Grospellier, Marcel Luske, Ram Vaswani, Noah Boeken and Annette Obrestad, a woman.

WPT Borgata Poker Classic: Griffin, Watkinson, Bonomo Among Chip Leaders with 27 Remaining

Something snarky.

Insert logo at right.

Other big names remaining include Men the Master, Nam Le, and Jared Hamby.

And the full chip counts link.

Jenna Jameson Dancing at the CatHouse for Tito's Birthday Video Makes for a Good Post

Retired porn star Jenna Jameson popped out of a birthday cake and did a striptease-esque dance for her boyfriend Tito Ortiz at the CatHouse in Las Vegas this weekend.

Ironically, Jenna kept her clothes on the whole time. Disappointingly, she didn't have a 4-way, strap-on love fest with the CatHouse chicks dancing with her. Desperately, she needs to eat a sandwich and get back to her porn star weight. Relatedly, RawVegas.tv's very own Andrea Tiede is the hot girl in lingerie on the CatHouse billboards you see all around Vegas right now. Thankfully, Andrea never disappoints.

Video of Jenna Jameson doing sexy dance for Tito Ortiz at Cathouse in Las Vegas

Foxwoods Casino Pulls a Monte Carlo, Roof Catches on Fire

Just before noon today, Foxwoods Resort and Casino in the Middle of Nowhere, Connecticut was the scene of a fire reminiscent of last week's roof fire at the Monte Carlo in Las Vegas.

According to eyewitnesses we didn't talk to, flames were burning in a lounge on the 8th floor of the casino's Great Cedar Hotel and was still burning as late as 1:15 pm. The top three floors of the hotel were evacuated at first, followed by the entire building and adjacent casino.

A total of 16 fire companies responded to the fire.

The Foxwoods Casino is the largest casino in the world and has the second largest poker room, just behind the Commerce Casino in Los Angeles. It hosts two World Poker Tour events, the Foxwoods Poker Classic and the Foxwoods World Poker Finals.

More on the story here and here but not here.

In related news, the MGM-owned Monte Carlo is still closed after last week's fire and it is not clear when it will be allowed to reopen.

In other exciting breaking news, one of us ate shrimp quesadillas for lunch. They were delish.

WPT Borgata Poker Classic: Gavin Griffin Takes the Chip Lead

If you're a fan of the new WPT website like we are, then you probably already know that Gavin Griffin was awarded the Blue Diamond Almonds Bold Player of the Day.

And one doesn't win that award for playing like a damn p*ssy. No way, bub.

In fact, Gavin Griffin ended Day 2 of the presumptuously-named WPT Borgata Poker Classic as chip leader, stacked at 563,000 (and earning himself a year's supply of almonds).

Gavin is trailed by Noah Schwartz, who is second overall with 477,000. Other big named big stacks include Justin Bonomo (377,400), Lee Watkinson (373,000), Jared Hamby (301,800), day 1 chip leader Lenny Cortellino (258,400), Jordan Rich, who is a ginger (249,900), Al Krux, who may or may not actually be Jason Lester or Creed from The Office (U.S. American version) (244,500), and Vanessa Rousso, who is from Duke (211,300).

Get full chip counts here and live reporting here.

Brandi Hawbaker's Sheriff's Card Up for Bid on eBay

Just when you were thinking to yourself, "You know, after (allegedly) robbing her ex-boyfriend blind and spewing that money at Commerce, I don't think Brandi Hawbaker could possibly get any hotter now," lo and behold, something has surfaced that does in fact make her hotter.

Brandi Hawbaker's super-smoking-hot Sheriff's Card (at right), otherwise known as her Stripper's card, has surfaced on eBay. According to Neverwin Poker: "This was pretty much the only thing left in Brandon's cleaned out condo when they broke up. David Sklansky bought this card for [her]..."

Current asking price is $35. That's just a pittance for a piece of history, people.

Bid on Brandi Hawbaker's Sheriff's card

UNSEXY UPDATE: This item has been removed from bidding.

* Thanks to reader John for the eBay link.

Joe Sebok, Justin Bonomo, and Vanessa Rousso, Who Is From Duke, Lead WPT Borgata Poker Classic

Isn't it presumptuous to name a poker tournament a "classic" before it's even done or been around long enough at least to have some true "classics" in its history before you can just name it a "classic? "

Ah who cares. Day 1 is done at the WPT Borgata Poker Classic. Lots of big names pepper the leaderboard. Lenny Cortellino, who made the final table at the Season 4 WPT World Poker Finals (won by Nick Schulman), is the overall chip leader, stacked at 213,000.

Big name big stack trailing Cortellino include John Phan (182,825), Joe Sebok (149,700), Justin Bonomo (148,675), Vanessa Rousso, who is from Duke (148,350), Jordan Rich, a ginger (125,025) and the spectacularly-breasted J.C. Tran (100,350).

Get full chip counts from the WPT here or live blogging from the Borgata Poker blogging team here.

Poker Advocate Charles Nesson on The Colbert Report

Harvard Law School Professor Charles Nesson, the founder of the Global Poker Strategic Thinking Society and one of the game's most outspoken advocates, was on "The Colbert Report" last night to make his case for poker, saying that it is "one of the best tools we have to teach negotiation, risk assessment, strategic thinking and other essential life skills." He also talks about his desire to start a poker university online as a way to teach strategy in an open education environment, and he proposes hosting a poker game for the presidential candidates.

Watch the clip from the show below, and check out the kind of creepy YouTube video he did about online poker after the jump.

Charlie Nesson on Colbert Report

Breaking: Monte Carlo in Las Vegas Is On Fire

From RawVegas.tv:

The roof, the roof, the roof at the Monte Carlo is on fire. Or at least the top four floors.

A massive blaze is burning at the Monte Carlo casino right now. We have a clear view from the RawVegas.tv office, where we see black fumes engulfing the Vegas skyline.

Speculation among a few placed calls is the fire resulted from a construction accident. We are waiting for confirmation on that.

The Monte Carlo is now evacuating the 3,000+ room hotel and casino.

UPDATE: They are now evacuating the Bellagio and other casinos on the Strip.

For video coverage of the Monte Carlo Casino and Hotel fire, stay tuned to RawVegas.tv.

Developing . . .

UPDATE: RawVegas.tv is reporting that the fire appears to be under control now. "No more plumes of smoke can be seen from our office or by the bridge where we are filming." They also have a video of the Monte Carlo fire, which from the angle and distance it was shot, kind of looks cozy.

Oh, We Thought You Said Celebrity, Not Celerity

A celebrity poker tournament in Park City the other day is being tagged by the Salt Lake Tribune as the biggest "doozy" of this year's Sundance Film Festival.

Up until the morning of the tournament, the event's sponsor Celerity Investments (who?) was hyping that a bunch of card tossing A-listers were confirmed to play, including Matt Damon, George Clooney, Charles Barkley and Michael Jordan.

According to the Trib blog though:

"Instead of Jason Bourne, Danny Ocean and the greatest basketball player of all time, spectators were treated to Miss USA Rachel Smith, Daniel Baldwin (maybe the least-known Baldwin brother), ex-NBA player-turned-talk show host John Salley, Ultimate Fighting champ Matt Hughes and Kato Kaelin. Yes, O.J.'s Kato Kaelin. And those were the most famous names at the table."

Trying to explain why the A-listers were no-shows, a rep from Celerity (who?) said, "A lot of those guys had scheduling conflicts."

As in they never had it on their schedules in the first place.

Word is that Celerity (who?) filmed the event hoping to air it sometime on Fox, which honestly, the cast of characters they had will make for way better TV than the ones they were hoping would show up, especially if Daniel Baldwin is whacked on the gak like he was a few years ago on Hollywood Home Game and Kato acts like, well, Kato. Plus you can never go wrong with having Miss USA on your set. Pageant chicks are a guaranteed good time.

Hey look! After the jump Miss USA Rachel Smith photos . . .

Hoyt Corkins, Men "The Master" Nguyen, and Freddy Deeb Do Not Win WPT World Poker Open, Can't Dunk a Basketball Either

In what has to be the shortest (height-wise) final table in WPT history (can that new STATS database run a query on this one?), Brett Faustman out-metaphored Hoyt Corkins for the World Poker Open crown in majestic Tunica, Mississippi.

This is Faustman's first major tournament cash. For the win, Faustman, who used to be a collegiate wrestler meaning he may have cauliflower ears, banks $892,413.

Hoyt Corkins, who has gone "all-in" more times than any other player in WPT history if you know what we mean, banks $458,267. Men "The Master" Nguyen finished third earning $241,193. Half-man, half-amazing Freddy Deeb came in fourth ($168,835), Gabe Costner finished fifth ($123,008), and everyone's favorite nicotine-addicted uncle John Spadavecchia came in sixth ($96,477).

In related news, after the final table wrapped, Corkins, Men the Master, Deeb, and Spadavecchia jockeyed some horses.

Final table updates from WPT.com

Good Thing Olga Kurylenko Is In It

When we saw a news headline yesterday about something called "Quantum of Solace," we thought, Stephen Hawking wrote a self-help book about coping with grief?

Isaac Asimov came back from the dead?

Orel Hershiser?

But nope, as you may or may not already know, Quantum of Solace is the awfully bad name for the new 007 flick starring new Bond girl and longtime WCP fave Olga Kurylenko (at right) as the girl Daniel Craig bangs and then dies at the end during some action sequence, we're guessing.

Apparently "Quantum of Solace" was the name of a short story in Ian Fleming's 1960 anthology "For Your Eyes Only," and according to Craig, the title of the film was "meant to confuse a little."

Or a lot.

No word on whether the new film will feature any poker scenes like Casino Royale did, badly. But it is being presented as a sequel to Royale, the most successful Bond film ever.

Anyway, we're really not so much into Bond films as as we are into the girls who are in Bond films, which is the only reason we ever post about them and will continue to do so. Get your fix of new Bond girls Olga Kurylenko and Gemma Arteton as well as the last Bond girl, Eva Green, below.

Olga Kurylenko photos

Olga Kurylenko video

Eva Green photos

Eva Green video clip from the movie Dreamers

Olga Kurylenko and Gemma Arteton at the announcement yesterday

Any Ideas?

Granted, this could be some 12 year-old kid making a post for shits and giggles, but here's something from the Las Vegas section in Craigslist. Working the assumption it's legit, readers leave ideas on who it could be in the comments section.

A King For A Queen Who Wants A Jack

I am a "ultra" high-stakes professional poker.

Due to being at the poker room or on the internet playing poker most of my adult life, I feel like I have missed out on something.

I want a child.

This could be a long term relationship or not. (Totally up to you.)

Mutually beneficial situation.

Send your picture. No pic, no reply.

Read the full Craigslist posting

Poker News and Girls You Won't Find Anywhere Near the World Poker Open, Which Wraps Today

:: The guy suing Washington State for criminalizing online poker is running for governor. [CardPlayer.com] :: Italian model Melita Toniolo's corpo is extraordinary-o. [DoubleViking.com] :: 24-hour casino poker action will give people in Edmonton, Canada a reason to leave their igloos. [CNNMoney.com] :: Perhaps Lucy Becker just can't find a bikini top big enough for her jumbo jugs. [Attuworld.com] (NSFW) :: Some guy won the WSOP Circuit event in Tunica, and you probably don't care. [Bluff Magazine] :: Camera angles and photoshop can be pretty kind to sex tape star Kim Kardashian. [DrunkenStepfather.com] :: What's your frequency Geeeeeber? The WSOP launches a weekly radio show hosted by Nick Geber. [PokerListings.com] :: Charlotte McKenna is another hot British girl who likes to take her clothes off for men's magazines. [ZooToday.com] (NSFW) :: Finland may or may not follow Sweden's suit in launching a state run online poker site. [4Flush.com] For live blog updates and videos throughout the day from the floor of the WPT World Poker Open, go here.

Men the Master Tilts Erick Lindgren, Takes Lead at WPT World Poker Open

Day 3 of the WPT World Poker Open, a non ladies-only event, is underway at the Gold Strike Casino in Tunica, Mississippi, and already the chipleader at the start of the day, Erick Lindgren, has been sent to the rail by an inebriated-ly obnoxious Men "The Master" Nguyen.

Not much more than 30 minutes after the start of play today, the two pros faced off in a big hand after the flop, with Lindgren pushing all-in after Nguyen raised Lindgren's lead-out bet. With the board showing Qh-4h-3d, Nguyen called and turned over pocket Queens and Lindgren showed Ah-10h for a nut flush draw. The turn and river came up black and blank, and as the WPT live blog reports:

Nguyen gets up from the table and really starts to celebrate, screaming, "Yes!" After a minute of this Lindgren says, "Act like you've been there before." To which, Freddy Deeb pipes in with, "We're not on TV yet." Nguyen counts out his chips and after Lindgren pays him off he holds 80,000.

Full hand details here.

Marginally crippled and visibly irritated, Lindgren then pushed all in with Ad-7d only to be called by Nguyen, who held As-9s. The board would be no help, sending Lindgren to the rail in 24th place ($12,060).

-----------

After 4+ hours of playing Wii Tennis in the midst of writing this post, we see that a few big name players, including John Phan, TJ Cloutier and Barry Greenstein, have been eliminated, but several top pros are still in the hunt with 13 players left including still-the-chipleader Nguyen, a "short AND bald" Freddy Deeb, the certifiably insane Dutch Boyd, Hoyt Corkins and John Spadavecchia.

-----------

UPDATE: Final table is set. Half-man half-amazing Freddy Deeb leads with 1,345,000. He's followed by Brett Faustman (1,282,000), Gabe Costner (1,181,000), Men Nguyen (729,000), Hoyt Corkins (395,000), and John Spadavecchia (256,000).

For live reports and chip counts from the World Poker Open, go here.

For how to open a beer bottle with a dollar bill, after the jump . . .

The WPT Gets Statistical, Which Involves Math, And Launches New ClubWPT, Which Involves Gambling

Tahdah! The World Poker Tour has found a way to kind of sort of get money from online U.S. American poker players.

The WPT announced yesterday the launch of ClubWPT.com, which they dub, "an innovative subscription-based online club and gaming platform."

Because it's easier to just copy and paste from the press release, ClubWPT:

"...offers a monthly subscription package for $19.95 per month, as well as discounted quarterly and annual options. In return, members receive points to enter into over 4,000 live poker and elimination black jack tournaments, sit-n-go’s and ring games for a chance to win over $100,000 in cash and prizes each month, which could include a $10,000 seat into a World Poker Tour® (WPT) main event. Other high-end prizes include a flatscreen HD television, shopping sprees, cruises, jewelry and more."

What, no "Win a Date with Kimberly Lansing and Layla Kayleigh?" Did we lose a war?

If that isn't enough, ClubWPT offers registered users a free subscription to All-In Magazine. In related news, All-In Magazine apparently is still in publication.

The WPT also announced it has partnered up with STATS, which as the name hints at, is a company that compiles data for sports leagues. Now on the WPT website, visitors can get:

"...in-depth analyses and strategic breakdowns for the poker industry. STATS will compile data from every final table hand played in every televised WPT tournament to detail each individual player’s style of play, situational analysis, breakdowns, trends, and more, allowing poker fans and players to study intricacies of the game in ways never available before."

Hoisting a not-so-thinly-veiled-shot at his competitor--the World Series of Poker--WPT head honcho Steve Lipscomb said, "If you won a World Series of Poker tournament years ago with 150 people in it, how does that compare to a WPT event with 500 people in it? This will tell you."

USA Today feature on ClubWPT.com and STATS

Official press release on ClubWPT.com and STATS

ClubWPT.com website 

World Poker Tour website

Jamie Gold's Mom Jane and Robert Varkonyi's Wife Olga Didn't Win WPTL Event

Have you seen Jerry O'Connell's Tom Cruise Scientology parody video yet (below)? Hilarious stuff. We've been fans of O'Connell for awhile--from his Sliders days to nailing Rebecca Romijn as his wife--and this just makes us like him even more 'cause the guy has some serious big balls to mock Tom Cruise and Scientologists. That's right, we like the guy more because he has big balls.

We unfortunately don't have the balls to poke fun at Scientologists and one of us even won a big balls contest in the 10th grade, which just goes to show that having a huge nut sack when you're 15 doesn't necessarily make one brave. We will share with you though a Scientology Orientation video that creeps the fuck out of us. It's #4 in a 4-part series someone posted on YouTube, and while the testimonials in the beginning from Kirstie Alley and John Travolta are worth viewing, the part that begins just before the 7:00 mark where the host basically says you can dive off a bridge and blow your brains out if you don't become a Scientologist is the good stuff. Creepy good. To any of our readers who are Scientologists, good luck with that.

Watch that video here.

Oh yeh, just caught a glimpse of the headline above and remembered this post was supposed to be about the debut World Poker Tour Ladies league event at the Borgata. So yeh, Jamie Gold's mom Jane and Robert Varkonyi's wife Olga didn't win. Some other woman did. That's all we got.

Keeley Hazell Busts Out New Bikini Photo Spread

Keeley Hazell reminded us once again why she's been the Official Wicked Chops Poker Girl for the last two years running and why she just may make a 32E-peat in 2008. Only a few weeks into the year and already our favorite massively natural breasted Brit hottie is doing what she does best, posing half naked for photos, this time in ZOO Magazine. And according to her interview*, Keeley is resolved to do even more photoshoots this year and says she is planning to release a book. The subject: her body. It's this type of commitment to shamelessly appeal to our prurient interests with one hot photo spread after another that makes it virtually inconceivable for some other girl to come along and unseat Keeley Hazell from her pole position at Wicked Chops Poker this year. Still, all options are currently being considered as we pick the OWCPG of 2008, and we encourage you to submit suggestions, futile as they may seem. If there's one thing we learned from Orel Hershiser being picked for NBC Heads-Up Poker and a frog riding a motorcycle, anything can happen. Anything. Photos of Keeley Hazell in ZOO Magazine after the jump. * Yep, we read the interview.

Orel Hershiser?

NBC announced its line-up of confirmed players for the 2008 National Heads-Up Poker Championship yesterday, and among the 60 listed are your usual suspects (Doyle, Hellmuth, Chan, Forrest, Greenstein, Ivey, Deeb, Negreanu, Farha et al), guys who won the WSOP Main Event who are not named Doyle, Hellmuth or Chan (Raymer, Hachem, Gold and Yang), the guys who runner up'd to a few of the guys just listed (Wasicka and Williams), players who haven't really done much at the table since Bush's first administration but apparently make for good TV to some people somewhere (Laak, Bellande, Esfandiari), a bunch of players who are better than almost all the other players (JC Tran, Clements, Edler, David Pham), some women poker players who are nowhere near as good as Annette Obrestad, a woman (Elizabeth, Tilly, Gowen, Rousso, Duke), the kid you don't know who won the 2007 WSOP Heads-Up event (Daniel Schreiber), a few who've made their names online (durr and sbrugby), an actor who makes us laugh (Brad Garrett), an actor who once made us laugh (Jason Alexander), an Oscar-nominated actor who is so frickin' cool you have to say "Fuckin" between his first and last name whenever you say his name (Don 'Fuckin' Cheadle) and one legendary Dodgers pitcher who we had no idea played poker (Orel Hershiser).

Yeh, Orel Hershiser. Apparently the former baseball tosser and current ESPN analyst kills it at the 1-2 table at Red Rock.

When the National Heads-Up Poker Championship gets underway February 29 - March 2 at Caesars in Las Vegas, a total of 64 players will battle it out in a bracket-style single elimination tournament with the winner walking away with $500,000. Each of the invited players will buy-in for $20,000 and two players will be chosen via satellites, one at Caesars on Feb. 17 and one online at Full Tilt.

After the jump a complete list of the players confirmed and a photo of a frog on a motorcycle.

Jamie Gold's Mom and Robert Varkonyi's Wife Doing Well at WPT Ladies Event

When we first heard that the debut WPT Ladies Tour event was underway at the Borgata in Atlantic Shitty we figured it involved a bunch of ladies sitting around wearing pink hats, giggling at the table, hugging each other and generally getting along like it was a Pampered Chef party or recipe swap shindig, if chicks do stuff like that, and we assume they do, rather than a serious poker tournament.

And then we thought, it's a new year and we should start things off fresh with no preconceived stereotypes about women and poker. We even remembered how the world didn't come to an end after Annette Obrestad, a woman, won the inaugural WSOP Europe Main Event last year.

And then we watched Kimberly Lansing's video blog on the WPT Ladies event and remembered that we are ridiculously goodlooking, which has nothing to do with the fact that we were right about the ladies at the WPT Ladies Tour event and everything to do with the mirror-like glare coming off the computer monitor right now.

As Kimberly Lansing and the headline above report, Robert Varkonyi's wife Olga (above right) and Jamie Gold's mom Jane are among the ladies still left in the $300 buy-in tournament. For up-to-date info on the tournament, go here.

Late Night Munchies Cost Jason "Tiny" Potter $30K in Australia

U.S. American poker player Jason Potter, who we're going to nickname "Tiny" because we like it when big guys have the nickname "Tiny" kind of like bald guys with the nickname "Curly" or nice, non-thiefy wholesome virgins with the nickname "Brandi Hawbaker," paid a hefty price for his late night stroll to a burger joint on the mean streets of Melbourne, Australia.

The 22-year-old from Oklahoma, who finished 31st at the Aussie Millions Poker Championship (good for a portly sum of $30,000), had just cashed in his winnings when he got the urge for a big fat juicy burger or three at McDonald's and got mugged on his way back.

As The Australian reports, "Potter was walking back to his hotel room at Crown Plaza after feasting at McDonald's about 4:30am" when a knife-wielding robber hit him over the head and made off with his cash.

"I had already been home to my hotel room but decided to go out and get something to eat because I was hungry," he said. "I heard someone running resolutely behind me. As I turned around I just got knocked on the back of the head. I fell down and this guy reached immediately into my hooded pocket."

Potter said he thought about fighting back but then realized that getting stabbed would suck.

For a TV news video account of the story, go here.

For Potter's 2p2 post on the mugging, go here.

For why you shouldn't walk around late at night with $30,000 cash in your pocket, go here.

2008 Aussie Millions: Some Russian Won It

The 2008 Aussie Millions Main Event is done, and Some Russian came out of nowhere to take it down.

The final table began with Michael [Ctrl + V] Chrisanthopoulos as a massive chip leader, 129 year-old Antonio Casale repping second, and poker legend Erik Seidel waiting in the wings.

But unlike WWII without U.S. America's help, the Cold War, the 1980 Winter Olympics, Rocky IV, Red Dawn, the Afghan War, and Boris Yeltsin's kidney, the Soviet Union actually came out on top in this one, as Some Russian defeated the field of 780 players to bank $1,650,000.

Some Russian defeated Erik Seidel ($1,000,000) for the title. Michael [Ctrl + P] Chrisanthopoulos finished third ($700,000). The rest of the final table payouts were: Peter Ling ($500,000), Nino Marotta ($400,000), Antonio Casale ($300,000), Peter Mobbs ($225,000).

2008 Aussie Millions: Michael Chrisanthopoulos, Who May Be Of Greek Descent, Massive Final Table Chip Leader

Ok, we're no CSI type sleuths. Detectiving takes up waaaay too much time and effort. Plus it requires putting logical thought processes together, like "If her blood and her friend's blood were both found in the accused's Bronco, and the accused also has a cut on his finger and his blood was found at the murder scene, then there's probably a 197% chance the accused did it." See? Just too much effort.

However, our deductive powers of reasoning, after many many hours of thought, have concluded that 2008 Aussie Millions Main Event final table chip leader, Michael Chrisanthopoulos, may be of Greek descent. Chrisanthopoulos, which by the way we have to copy and paste every time we mention because there's no way we'll remember how to spell that one, is a massive chip leader, is stacked at 6,810,000.

[Ctrl+V] Chrisanthopoulos is trailed by 129 year-old Antonio Casale with 1,991,000. Casale's showing is extra impressive since during every hand he says "Huh? What? What'd he say? I don't hear so good. Could you speak louder?" and often has to be waken up from naps in between hands.

Big names at the final table also include Erik Seidel (1,487,000), Erik Seidel (1,487,000), and Erik Seidel (1,487,000).

Get final table chip counts from Poker News here.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding fan site

List of oldest people alive

Brandon "Pimprexel" Hits NWP Radio to Dish on Brandi Hawbaker

This just hit NWP and all three Entities are watching while typing this, but Brandon "pimprexel" talks to Bryan Micon and gives everyone a "public service announcement" on Brandi Hawbaker (now Naami Dea), detailing all of the alleged allegations surrounding the sexy/hot/controversial poker princess (what she allegedly stole, the prostitution allegations, alleged bi-sexuality, alleged drugs of choice, and allegedly more).

Watch the video below or at Neverwin Poker.

Poker Player Rick Salomon Not Gonna Be a Daddy

Pokerer Rick Salomon, who you know for finishing in 196th place at the 2006 WSOP Main Event filming himself banging a teenage Paris Hilton, apparently won't have to worry about child support when he and his wife Pamela Anderson finally get around to divorcing each other. According to TMZ.com, Pamela is no longer knocked up, or perhaps never was.

The poker playing couple was rumored to be heading to Melbourne, Australia to play the Aussie Millions Poker Championship but Anderson's sponsored deal with the Crown fell through. We assume Salomon never made it either as he was spotted hanging with Anderson in Malibu over the weekend.

In related news and the real purpose of this post, Croatian goddess Nina Moric is a MILF we'd LF more than mother-of-two Pamela Anderson. Photos of Nina Moric showing off her sickly hot body in a bikini after the jump.

* Image of Rick Salomon from TheHendonMob.com

Sex-Texter Shane Warne Gets in SMS Trouble at Aussie Millions

Shane Warne, the Australian cricket legend and now full-time pokerer for 888.com, was busted Wednesday at the Aussie Millions Poker Championship for sending text messages at the poker table, something that is generating news in the media and cricket circles because the leg spinner famously has a penchant for SMS-ing chicks he bangs and wants to bang who aren't his wife.

No word on who Warne was texting at the table yesterday, which resulted in him getting a 5 minute penalty, but we're gonna go out on a limb and say it was Australian hottie Emily Scott (above pic). Why? Because we like the photos of Emily Scott after the jump.

2008 Aussie Millions: Main Event Field Goes From "High Profile" to "Kind of Boring"

As the money bubble burst yesterday at the 2008 Aussie Millions, the potential for a big name, big personality final table seemed a lock. Still in the field included Perry Friedman, Erick Lindgren, Matt Matros, Tom "Durrr" Dwan, Kenna James, Raymond Rahme, Kevin 'BeL0WaB0Ve' Saul, Peter "Nordberg" Feldman, Tiffany "Crazy Bitch" Williamson, and Andy Black.

However, after the eliminations of Perry Friedman, Erick Lindgren, Matt Matros, Tom "Durrr" Dwan, Kenna James, Raymond Rahme, Kevin 'BeL0WaB0Ve' Saul, Peter "Nordberg" Feldman, Tiffany "Crazy Bitch" Williamson, and Andy Black, much of the intrigue and luster has vanished from the 2008 Aussie Millions Main Event.

With only 22 remaining, the event chip leader is 129 year-old Antonio Casale from Australia (at right), who was actually one of the first non-Aboriginal inhabitants of Australia. He's stacked at 1,513,000, or roughly the number of days he's been alive.

Also still around include Max Pescatori (1,082,000) and Erik Seidel (752,000). Get full chip counts from Poker News here.

* Image from Poker News.

American Idol "I Am Your Brother" Audition Not Sung By Tiffany "Crazy Bitch" Williamson, However, Tiffany "Crazy Bitch" Williamson Is Actually Doing Well at 2008 Aussie Millions

One of the first posts that put Wicked Chops Poker "on the map" was on 2005 WSOP Main Event top-female-finisher Tiffany "Crazy Bitch" Williamson (read that epic post here).

Since then, we haven't seen any much of her. At all. None. She's been about as anonymous from the scene as Jerry Yang.

Seemingly out of nowhere, Williamson has reappeared at the 2008 Aussie Millions and is actually sucking out mercilessly on people as she gets her money in time and time again with the worst of it doing well. Going into Day 3 play, Williamson was on a path to cashing, stacked around 140k.

Also on a path to cashing in is 2008 American Idol contestant Renaldo Lapuz, whose "We're Friends Forever (I Am Your Brother)" has been stuck in our damn heads all day long and will likely make this kid some decent change. This video is going to be the new Rick Roll. Watch the I Am Your Brother audition and get the lyrics after the jump.

* Photo from Poker News.

2008 Aussie Millions: U.S. American Matthew LaGarde Leads the Way, Many Big Names in Contention

Day 2 wrapped at the 2008 Aussie Millions, and Matthew LaGarde of Salibury, MD is big stacked at 490,000. LaGarde had three cashes in 2007, including a 12th in WSOP Event #15 where Phil Hellmuth won his 11th bracelet.

Only 98 remain...80 will make the money.

Big names among the big stacks include: Kevin "BeL0WaB0Ve" Saul (400,000), Erik Seidel (330,000), Andy Black (271,000), Peter "Nordberg" Feldman (207,000), 2007 WSOP ME third-place finisher Raymond Rahme (200,000), Perry Friedman (148,000), and Tom "durrrr" Dwan (145,000).

Phil Ivey, Tony G, and Kenny Tran were among the big names eliminated.

Get full chip counts from Poker News here.

Waaaaiiit A Minute Here...Salty Joe Hachem and Britney Spears an Item?

Listen, the first last thing we want Wicked Chops Poker to be is a rumor-monger website. But how this one has gone unreported by "mainstream" media is beyond us.

With the 2008 Aussie Millions Main Event in full swing, it's time to address a potential non-Brandi-Hawbaker bombshell about one of Australias favorite non-native sons.

The pop culture world has been buzzing about Britney Spears and this new boyfriend (fiance?) of hers, "Adnan Ghalib." However, can we be so sure that this "Adnan Ghalib" isn't actually 2005 WSOP Main Event champ "Salty" Joe Hachem?

Evidence: 1) If you were to make up a name, "Adnan Ghalib" would have to be one of your first choices, right behind "Chandrasekhar Billavara" and "Lance McCrackin", 2) Who the fuck still has a flavor-saver...like only one person in the world still does that, right?, and 3) the photos below.

Like we said, the absolute very first last thing we want to do is spread false rumors, but you be the judge...

 

David Williams A Fan of Borgata...Not So Much of Tunica Though

Gotta hand it to David Williams. Dude calls it like he sees it.

In his latest vlog on RawVegas.tv, David Williams goes over his early poker schedule (yah on Borgata, Tunica, nay on the Aussie Millions). While admitting that the one shining gem in the shithole that is Atlantic City--The Borgata--is "one of my favorite places on the east coast," DW isn't so fond of Tunica, which he calls, "a boring place in the middle of nowhere." True. True.

DW also goes on about another favorite spot, Commerce Casino, and a session where he banked about $90k in 40 hours. Watch the full clip below.

Speaking of the Borg, read coverage of the Borgata Winter Poker Open (getting huge prelim fields)

2008 Aussie Millions: Soren Ericksen, Kenna James Lead Day 1C

Day 1's are wrapped at the 2008 Aussie Millions Main Event. With 780 official entrants, the total first place prize will be $1,447,544 USD. Thanks Heaps! One could be making a quid off that!

Soren Ericksen ended Day 1c as chip leader, stacked at 150,000. Other big stacks included Kenna James (100,000), Jon "Pearljammer" Turner (67,400), Alex Kravchenko (60,500), and Howard Lederer (40,000).

Get full chip counts from Poker News here.

Catch up on your Australian slang while playing with your old fella

Brandi Hawbaker Now Naami Daya, Ex-Boyfriend Pimprexel to Appear on Neverwin Poker Radio

Thanks to reader 4Dragons for the heads-up on this.

Bryan Micon got Brandon "pimprexel" to agree to dish on the break-up dramabomb that has, well, somehow captitvated the poker world on Neverwin Poker Radio.

One bombshell appears to be that Brandi's new name is Naami Daya. Didn't realize she was Ethiopian.

Watch a teaser of the vid below and see the new Neverwin thread here.

Randy Couture's "Operation All-In" Charity Raised a Bunch of Money for Our Troops

The Entities who comprise Wicked Chops Poker aren't so much "into" charity as we're not "into" charity. However, we freaking love U. S. America and support the hell out of our troops.

So in our latest webisode of The TOKE, we feature UFC heavyweight champ Randy Couture's "Operation All-In" charity event. The re-buy poker tournament was to raise money for his Xtreme Couture G.I. Foundation.

Lots of big names attended the fundraiser. 2006 WSOP champ Jamie Gold, who participates in numerous charities, mc'd the event. Poker stars Phil Gordon, Kirk Morrison, Scotty Nguyen, and Todd Brunson played. MMA'ers Randy Couture (of course), Stephan Bonnar and Frank Trigg also took part. And celebs Montell Williams, Jose Canseco, and Dean Cain joined in the action.

The event was won by James Scott, who entered on a whim. He bested James Trigg for the title. Footage of the event below.

Jamie Gold Did Not Hook Up with Brandi Hawbaker

How Wicked Chops Poker turned into the Brandi Hawbaker Network over the past 48 hours is beyond us, but whatever, it's great for ratings.

So we got word direct from the source that 2006 WSOP champ Jamie Gold never hooked up with Brandi (can we get a nickname for her from one of our readers? anyone?) as has been reported on WCP the forums. So let's strike that hook-up from the record for those keeping tabs at home. Didn't happen. Our apologies.

Jamie Gold's exclusive WCP interview

Jamie Gold on RawVegas.tv

Brandi Hawbaker Still Has Not Responded on 2+2 But This Graphic Is Funny

While 2+2'ers eagerly awaits a response from Brandi Hawbaker on her break-up dramabomb, hats off to poster THEHANDOFGOD for putting together the above graphic (click to enlarge). It got a chuckle out of us, which is tough because we don't like smiling. Uses too many muscles. Effort effort effort...

2008 Aussie Millions: Some Guy Named Phil Ivey Day 1B Chip Leader

One thing is for sure: Phil Ivey has been taking early level play in major events seriously lately.

Ivey led the World Poker Tour Doyle Brunson Five Diamond World Poker Classic All-Star Spectacular (WPTDBFDWPCASS) back in December before flaming out just short of the money. And if we searched hard enough, we could find another example or two of this as well but effort effort effort blah blah blah.

Phil Ivey crushed yet another first few levels of play of a major event, ending Day 1b of the 2008 Aussie Millions Day as chip leader, stacked at 163,330.

The leaderboard is filled with big names, including: Jeffrey Lisandro (138,400) Max Pescatori (137,600), "Salty" Joe Hachem (111,400), Kevin "BeL0WaB0Ve" Saul (79,700), Erick Lindgren (78,600), and Peter "Nordberg" Feldman (61,200).

Day 1c starts in a few hours.

Get full chip counts and live coverage at Poker News here.

David Sklansky Did Not Have Sex With Three Billy Goats, Weighs In On Latest Brandi Hawbaker Dramabomb, and Some Other New Brandi Hawbaker Rumors

The pimprexel/Brandi Hawbaker break-up thread has blown up on 2+2, so much so that it even briefly crashed the famed forum's database.

So much gossip is being thrown around it's hard to even know where to start. Actually, no it's not:

:: David Sklansky, who kind of looks like he'd be Robert Varkonyi's father, responded to pimprexel's comment that, "...I am not sure if things I know about second hand or even have witnessed regarding others would be appropriate to disclose i.e sklansky, relationships with other well known pro's, things that she did to earn money during the world series etc. ." To which Sklansky said: "You have my permission to post anything that you think you know about me that is both important and is something you think I am keeping secret. Either do that or kindly retract your implication."

:: Sklansky later added this classic line in another post: "I'm not going to spend hours proving I didn't have sex with three billy goats or whatever else you might claim she said." Read more on that thread page here.

:: However, Sklansky did admit he told Brandi to use the high rollers to get cash for buy-ins, etc. Brandi interpreted this as "let them bang you for money," which would explain why she suddenly stopped talking to Sklansky and ignored him when he bumped into her a few months later. More on that here.

:: We reported over the summer that there might've been something going on with Brandi and 2006 WSOP champ Jamie Gold. That relationship seems to have been confirmed in some of the posts. Read our story from this past summer here and a 2+2 thread here.

:: Brandi also is rumored to have banged Gus Hansen during the WSOP this summer. However, Gus being Gus wouldn't give her a penny. Shit, Gus bangs so many chicks he probably already forgot he nailed Brandi. "Which one is that. Ya not ringing a bell." But more on that here.

:: Brandi then also was reportedly with 2001 WSOP and 2007 WPT champ Carlos Mortenson for a few weeks at the end of 2006. Read that thread here.

:: And finally, one poster ran a public records search on Brandi, and it turns out she may not be 25, but actually 32 or 33. More on that here.

All of this, of course, makes Brandi that much hotter. Now, the world poker forums await for Brandi to respond. Developing...

Brandi's interview about her relationship with David Sklansky at the 2007 WSOP

2008 Aussie Millions Main Event: Ex-Monk Andy Black Day 1a Chip Leader

We're beginning to think that when it comes to the Aussie Millions, the phrase "luck of the Irish" does not apply to Andy Black. Because Andy Black creates his own luck at the Aussie Millions. Eh? Eh?

Damn, that intro was so bad even the writers at Card Player threw up in their mouths.

2007 Aussie Millions third place finisher Andy Black has continued his good-run into this year's Main Event. The ex-monk finished Day 1a of this year's Main Event as chip leader, stacked at 167,800.

In total, 215 runners were part of Day 1a action. The field whittled down to 91 players by the end of the day. Black was followed by Shane Moran (122200), Dusan Stoevski (113000), and Greg "FBT" Mueller (108400).

Other notable big stacks include 2007 WSOP Main Event final table-ist Raymond Rahme (79,000), high-stakes cash specialist Kenny Tran (75,800), and online phenom Tom "durrrr" Dwan (67,500).

Get full chip counts at Poker News here.

House of Pain's "Jump Around"

The Proclaimer's "500 Miles"

Brandi Hawbaker Is Single

So right after getting POB'd by Captain Tom and in between being "mentored" by David Sklansky and converting to Judaism, Brandi Hawbaker was apparently dating 2+2 poster Brandon "pimprexel."

Unamazingly, pimprexel's relationship with Brandi went bad. Like, really, really bad. Like steal $40k in property and belongings while spewing it all at Commerce Casino while breaking your heart bad.

In this 2+2 post, pimprexel tells a story unfortunately told all too often: that of a dude who gets to bang a totally hot girl and because she's so hot and the sex is so good, the dude overlooks some red flags that the girl might be fucking crazy.

Pimprexel painstakingly admits he "made a mistake" by falling for Brandi and allowing her to explain away stuff like this:

"When I met Brandi, I was a pitboss in a casino in Vegas. While working one day, something told me to enter her name into a data base that casinos centrally use to collaborate information on cheats, barred patrons, prostitutes etc. I entered her name in hoping nothing would come back. Even expecting the worse, I was still shocked at with was displayed on the screen. Not only had she been barred from several casinos for loitering, bad checks, she had also been 86'd (casinos term for barred) for prostitution. Upon further examination, I found out she had been arrested several times in Las Vegas Casinos for soliciting undercover officers."

That's right, prostitution!

Pimprexel then took Brandi in, let her live with him, loaned her money ($5k at a time), but eventually broke up with her when she got too out of control. That's when the whole robbing his place blind occurred.

So that's the bad news. The good news is that Brandi is single, hot, and probably the best sex you'll ever have. Shouldn't someone be throwing a parade? Sure, after a few months with her you'll end up a shell of the man you were before, but that's what all girls do to dudes. At least you know what you're getting into with her. Or as poster "soccertease" on the Neverwin forum so aptly put it: "Something about this just makes her that much hotter."

Read pimprexels 2+2 post

More on the dramabomb over at Neverwin

Howard Lederer Gets Even More Rich, Wins Aussie Millions $100k Buy-In

As [one of] the brains behind the launch of Full Tilt Poker, Howard Lederer doesn't exactly *need* the money. However, Howard *has* the money. And if you play poker and have the money, a must event every year in the Aussie Millions $100k buy-in.

Last year Erick Lindgren took it down, banking a cool mil. This year, Edog returned, along with the usual suspect (Phil Ivey, Erik Seidel, Tony G, Gus Hansen, the aforementioned Lederer, and Chris "Jesus" Ferguson), as well as online superstars Michael 'Timex' McDonald, Tom 'durrr' Dwan, and Jeff 'ActionJeff' Garza.

Twenty-five players entered (last year only 18 did), creating a first prize of $1.25M. 2007 winner Erick Lindgren took the chip lead to the final table, but bubbled in sixth place when his flopped trip kings lost to a turned flush. Howard Lederer then began his pragmatic ascension to the chip lead, eventually beating Mark Teltscher for the $1.2M win.

After the victory, Lederer said [probably to himself]: "I can't wait to add this one-point-two-five mil to the piles of other one-point-two-five-mils that I'll never spend in my lifetime."

Get more event coverage from Poker News here.

* Photo and pretty much all information for this post from Poker News.

Absolute Poker Scandal: Final Audit Released by Kahnawake Gaming Commission, Everything We Thought Happened Confirmed, $500k Fine Imposed

In the biggest scandal to rock poker last year that nobody cares about anymore, the Kahnawake Gaming Commission (KGC)--the organization that licenses to approximately 60% of global online casinos and poker rooms--has released its final audit assessing the conduct of the douchebags at Absolute Poker--the organization whose executive douchebags (at right) scammed millions of dollars from of its faithful customers through a super-user account.

Not surprisingly, the audit confirmed that a form of insider cheating through the super-user account had occurred at AP. However, the cheating did not necessarily benefit the AP corporate organization, but instead super-asshole accounts like Potripper (at right). This cheating began approximately on August 14, 2007, which would absolve Mark Seif from those who believed he cheated in one "questionable" session.

AP was fined $500k for four cited breaches of the KGC's Regulations concerning Interactive Gaming, as well as the cost associated with the audit. Additionally, AP is required to post an unspecified sum of a security deposit against future violations. This sum will be held for two years.

Wicked Chops Poker spoke with our legal analyst, Oscar McGoldenstein, who said, "The official legal terminology for the fines and actions taken against AP would be called 'slap on the wrist.'"

More on the Absolute Poker Scandal audit at Poker News

Mark Seif's thoughts on the scandal

Dan Druff's response to Mark Seif

Hard Knock Luck: Jay-Z Rumored to Have Lost $500k Recently in Poker

For those who don't know, rapper/mogul Jay-Z (born Jay-Zee) has been a more frequent presence on the Las Vegas scene, having just opened The 40/40 Club at the new Palazzo extension to the Venetian.

This is good news for high stakes poker players, as money ain't a thing to Jay-Z, and he likes to gamble.

As first reported by mediatakeout.com here, Jay-Z has recently lost over $500k in high stakes poker games.

Says Poker Listings on one of the crucial hands:

Jay-Z was allegedly holding a pair of queens but his opponent had the nut-flush meaning disaster for the man also known as Shawn Carter.

Watch the RawVegas.tv Daily News for more on the story

Headline We'll Use If Annette Obrestad Wins Aussie Millions Event: Annette Obrestad Comes On Top Down Under; Also, Shane Warne Signs Deal with 888.com

If we were Stephen A. Smith, we'd start this article by screaming saying, "Let's keep it real." When Annette Obrestad won the inaugural WSOP Europe Main Event, that pretty much used up all of our "a woman just won a major poker tournament" jokes for the next decade. Because seriously, like that'll happen again in our lifetime.

So instead of sitting on this one until 2055, let's just go on record and say that if Annette Obrestad wins the 2008 Aussie Millions Main Event (we reference Annette because she's the only woman that has shown she can win such an event--PROVE US WRONG ANNA WROBLEWSKI), then our headline would definitely be: Annette Obrestad Comes On Top Down Under. Gold, we tells ya. Gold.

In completely unrelated news, Shane Warne, the controversial cricketer-turned-poker-player, will soon announce a deal with 888.com. Said deal will be confirmed early next week. And that's the bloody oath!

The opposite of "bodgy" Aussie Millions reporting

Pamela Anderson Not to Play Aussie Millions, Still Knocked Up

So now the latest out of our favorite land of criminals, Australia, is that recently impregnated Pamela Anderson will not be playing in the 2008 Aussie Millions. Word on the whatever-they-call-"street"-in-Australia is that she could not land a sponsorship deal. To which we say: so what? How does Pam not have an extra $10k laying around? Can't she just pork some dude with the cash like she did when she banged Rick Solomon Salomon--who in a related story is still playing in the 2008 Aussie Millions--to pay off her $250k poker debt?

One more fling like that for Pamela, and apples, she'll be.

Australian slang dictionary

Pamela Anderson to Play Aussie Millions Knocked Up

Pamela Anderson, the morally casual milf who paid off a quarter of a million dollar poker debt with sex, is reportedly pregnant courtesy of her soon to be ex-husband Rick Salomon, who may or may not be a poker pro but who is famous for filling and filming himself filling a teenage Paris Hilton a few years ago.

Althought divorce proceedings for the newlyweds are well underway, Anderson and Salomon are rumored to be heading to Melbourne this week to spread their disease and pestilence play the Aussie Millions Poker Championship along with other poker playing celebs like Shannon Elizabeth, Jennifer Tilly, Andy Roddick and Michael Vartan. While Salomon, Elizabeth and Tilly will buy themselves into the $10k tournament, word is that Pamela Anderson will have her seat paid for by tournament host Crown Casino in exchange for promoting the event.

In other breaking slutty hot pregnant chicks playing poker news . . . well, that's all we got.

The Aussie Millions Poker Championship Main Event gets underway this Monday. Stay tune here to Wicked Chops Poker for the most in-depth Aussie Millions coverage you'll find anywhere, as long as you're not really looking anywhere but here.