Shannon Elizabeth is Maxim Cover Girl, Doing New Reality Show with Dancer Kid She's Dating

Poker playing actress/cougar Shannon Elizabeth, who you may recall us mentioning in a few dozen posts was on Dancing With the Stars, is the new Maxim cover girl (June issue) with a multi-page photo spread inside that can be best described in one word: "zzzzzzzzzz."

Sorry but considering that Shannon has done the naked thing a few times, doing a photo spread where half her body is covered is a big step backwards for us. What's next, a STUFF spread in a pantsuit? An FHM shoot in a burka? Wait, that could be hot. Someone needs to start a hotchicksinburkas.com website. It'll probably be huge if Barack Obama wins the election and has his way. He’s Muslim, right?

As we pointed out before, Shannon hasn't done a decent hot photo spread since Y2K, and hot photo spreads have made great advances in the past 8 years under the Bush administration, so we were hoping for something hotter along the lines of what other DwtS chicks have done like Kelly Monaco and Stacey Kiebler (worth-the-click examples here, here, here and here).

Instead we get photos of Shannon in panties(?) that look like something Johnny Weissmuller would have worn.

And not even one look-from-behind. What's a photo spread without a good look-from-behind?

Seriously, did the terrorists win? Because if the terrorists won, this is the type of shit they'd do. B-a-r-a-c-k O-b-a-m-a.

Anyway, she does show off the gams like a champ so she has that going for her and if you didn't get enough of them on Dancing with the Stars, you can get your fill below.

In related Shannon Elizabeth news, Spice Girl Mel B., who someone just told us was on Dancing with the Stars once, is reportedly producing a new reality show starring Shannon and her boy crush/dance partner Derek Hough, a Mormon. Word is that the show will follow the two "as their careers evolve and their romance blossoms" or in other words, will be as interesting as watching this.