Celebrity Apprentice: Annie Duke vs. Joan Rivers Finale Sunday Night

Will Annie Duke win the Celebrity Apprentice on Sunday? Or will Donald Trump give it to Joan Rivers because she's the bigger celebrity and she'll bitch like a spoiled brat 5 year-old if she doesn't win?

Many in entertainment are calling this year's Celebrity Apprentice"the best worst reality television in history." And 99% of why it would be dubbed that [compliment] is due to the feud between Annie Duke and Joan Rivers (pictured here).

Sunday night, NBC airs its three-hour finale. Annie and Joan have been making the media rounds this week to promote it. Joan of course has been adding fuel to the fire by taking her shots at Annie and the poker community in general, telling Page Six:

"How can I hate poker players? Did you ever look at the cards? Everyone knows I love queens. Poker playing is a very noble profession. A little-known fact is Florence Nightingale had to choose between nursing and cards."

Joan also is taking her shots through Twitter, calling Annie "Ann-ME," and saying: 

"If you really look closely, Ann-ME did a lot of sobbing when she won but not one tear came out...[Watch] how Annie Duke does EVERYTHING and lets us know every second how brilliant she is...."

Actually, looking at Rivers' Twitter page, her hatred of Annie Duke is bordering on maniacal and unhealthy, similar to the way we feel about Danny Gokey.

Doyle Brunson has jumped into the fray to poker's defense via Twitter as well, tweeting:

"Joan Rivers went to the doctor for a zit on her butt. He told her it was a brain tumor....[ouch]"

And:

"Why is Joan River's brain the size of a pea in the morning?.......It swells at night."

Doyle had about 10 more slams (read here) and said that, "I'll quit tweeting about Joan Rivers when she apologizes to the poker world."

Tune in NBC tomorrow at 8pm to watch how Donald Trump arbitrarily gives the title to Joan even though Annie out-played her the entire season, because let's face it, you know that's what's going to happen.

Doyle Brunson Is Into Torture, Not Feeling Too Great

Doyle Brunson is tired.

Famous blogger/poker player Doyle Brunson should be writing for us. Seriously. The guy pens sheer gold almost every time.

In his latest and greatest, Doyle gives his argument on why torturing is OK:

"I just watched a clip about the terrorists that were being held at Guantanamo Bay... I can’t believe anyone would object to anything that might save thousands of American lives. It’s not that I believe torture should be used in most cases, but my gosh, if we can prevent another 9-11, anything should be accepted."

Better put than our argument, which is just us repeating "U-S-A! U-S-A!" over and over.

He then also says that Harry Truman made the decision to drop the atomic bomb while playing a poker game (maybe Doyle was the one who tilted him into it? Doyle was like 40 when that happened, right?)

He also explains why he didn't go to the LAPC, saying, "Maybe old age really is sitting in. Whatever it is, I sure don’t like it."

Is his kick the bucket prop bet actually in play now? And why does it feel kind of gross just typing that?

Read in full here.

Doyles Room Moves To Cake, Now Open To (Most) US American Players

DoylesRoom.com, the online poker room of famed poker blogger and pro beer ponger Doyle Brunson, is now accepting players from U.S. America (except those commie states that have laws against it) after moving to the Cake Poker Network. The site took U.S. American players when it first launched in 2004 but had restricted them after its previous networks banned them because of fear of operating in U.S. America after the passing of the UIGEA.

Said the not-dead-yet Doyle about the move to Cake:

“We wanted to offer our players a rewarding place to play. The liquidity and integrity associated with the Cake Poker Network made this an easy choice for our new partnership.”

Okay not sure what he just said there but hey look, Danielle Lloyd is naked again.

Doyle Brunson Not Planning to Kick Bucket in 2009

Good thing the cart master in Monty Python and the Holy Grail wasn't walking by when Doyle  was napping.

A few weeks ago poker blogger Doyle Brunson made news for making CinemaBlend.com's 2009 100 Most Likely People to Die List. The expected cause of death was listed as obesity and the website put the chances of Doyle kicking the bucket by year's end at 10%.

Well Doyle, who is so old that when he reads about the Civil War he reminisces, has called out Mack Rawden of Cinema Blend and issued a wager.

Said Doyle:

Some clown who produces the, “Blend Celebrity Bucket List”, put the 100 most likely celebs to die in 2009.  Guess who he had at #16?  That’s right, me.  To start with, I don’t consider myself a celebrity, so I don’t qualify.  But, if I did, I sure don’t have any plans for kicking the bucket anytime soon and surely not in 2009.  He should check on my family genes, both sides lived up into their 90’s.  He should talk to my doctor and get my blood pressure results, my 140 reading on my cholesterol and the raves my cardiologist gives me on my EKG’s.  He said obesity would cause my death.  He should have seen me 5 years ago when I was 130 lbs heavier.  Anyway, he said it was a 10% chance I would die.  I would like to lay 10-1 for any amount if anybody knows this joker.

Word is Rawden got a hold of Brunson and took him up on the offer, wagering $1,000 to Doyle's $10k. Proceeds are said to be going to the American Cancer Society, so if Doyle does die this year in say some mysterious mobility scooter accident, we know who we'll be suspicious of.

In related news, the Bring Out Your Dead scene in Monty Python and the Holy Grail after the jump....

Doyle Brunson Makes Bucket List

While we could probably name fiftytrilliongazillion poker players whose lifestyles would make them a more likely candidate to croak in '09, Blend Celebrity has just published their annual 100 Most Likely to Die List, and clocking in at number 16 is Doyle Brunson.

Says the site:

Cause: Obesity
Reason: Still nearly as sharp as when he won back to back World Series Of Poker Main Event titles, Doyle’s weight has been quite an issue for awhile. The legend once lost a hundred pounds in a year to win a million dollar bet, but Texas Dolly’s seventy-five year old frame won’t be able to support him forever.
Chance We’ll See An Obituary: 10%

We predicted that the 2009 WSOP would definitely be Doyle's last, but damn, 1-10 shot at making it to 2010?

Topping the list was Andy Rooney and Tom Sizemore. Works for us. View the entire list here.

Wicked Chops Poker Predictions for 2009

(This column is running in the current Bluff Magazine. Funny thing is if we had waited a month, we would have altered some of these, but whatever.)

As any regular reader of our site knows, the Entities who comprise Wicked Chops Poker have a truly sick ability at making accurate predictions. Our call on Chino Rheem on Day 1 of the 2008 WSOP Main Event solidified our status in that respect for awhile.

We could go on a Nostradamus-esque 500 year run of off-base whack-job vague and ambiguous prognostications now and nobody would care. Our rep is secured. Our track record for accurate predictions in Bluff Magazine ain’t so bad either. Let’s look back at last year’s Bluff column: We predicted that Daniel Negreanu would have a monster year (check), Jerry Yang will fade into oblivion (check), female poker players will continue to prove us wrong and win a few things (check), the UIGEA will not shrink the number of online poker players (check), Shawn Sheikhan won’t be deported (check), then a couple that we got wrong but whose counting? Bottomline is we make the aforementioned Nostradamus look like Neville Chamberlain when it comes to accurate takes on the future.

On with our official Wicked Chops Poker predictions for 2009.

:: The World Poker Tour will stop the bleeding. While we’re not predicting a resurgence and record profits for the WPT in 2009, we actually think they’ll start righting the ship this year. With a partnership in place with Full Tilt Poker, cutting some more events, and staffing itself more efficiently, the WPT may only lost eleventy billion dollars this year instead of four gazillion.

:: The November Nine™ concept will be an unequivocal success. If there’s one thing that Jeffrey Pollack and crew have shown us it’s that they learn from their mistakes and get better and better each and every WSOP. From June to July, this year’s WSOP was the best on the books. But the much trumpeted November Nine™ hostage concept fell flat. There was zero mainstream build-up or appeal. Even hardcore poker fans gave it a big “meh” for the most part. Not this year though. Look for the November Nine™ to be an actual TV spectacle event in 2009. Or at a minimum, look for it to be a few ticks above the Stanley Cup Finals in the public’s general consciousness.

:: Annie Duke will be in the spotlight. We’ll just keep this one simple. We predict a deep run on the Celebrity Apprentice for the super-smart Annie Duke and a switch of online poker site affiliation away from UltimateBet and to something that rhymes with Bull Filt Moker.

:: This will be Doyle’s last WSOP Main Event. We’ve watched Doyle’s enthusiasm for big tournament poker wane over the years. At the few tourneys we saw him at, he showed about the same amount of enthusiasm as Kim Kardashian did in her sex tape with Ray-J (i.e. not much). So it just feels like he’ll throw his cowboy hat in after completing the WSOP Main Event in ’09. Let’s just hope he has a Jack Nicklaus ’86 Masters run left in him.

:: Michael Phelps will no show. The poker world was in ecstasy after Michael Phelps declared his love of online poker in 2008 and showed up at a few tournaments. “Hey, look at us world! We’re legitimate!” Things look even more promising now that he’s rumored to be dating Las Vegas cocktail waitress Caroline “Caz” Pal. “He’ll definitely be in Vegas playing more poker now!” Well, one of two things will happen: 1) Caz will step in and say, “Michael, stop playing so much poker and spend more time with meeeeeeeeeeeee,” which he’ll do because she’s hot and because all women except our current/first wives do that, or 2) his handlers will get a hold of him and say, “Uh yeah Michael, see, palling around with a bunch of degenerate gamblers is kind of like Barack Obama having barbeques with Bill Ayers. We’ve got $100 million in endorsements lined up so can you just stay out of the Rio Amazon Room for six weeks this summer, please?”

:: Either UltimateBet or Absolute Poker will fold. It’s got to happen, right? The fact that anyone still plays on either of these sites, especially UltimateBet, whose co-founder Russ Hamilton is allegedly implicated in cheating players out of hundreds of thousands of dollars (if not more), baffles us. Sure, they’ve come together to form a network called CEREUS, but either mounting public pressure for regulation or hopefully through some form of karmic retribution, one of these sites will go under. If it doesn’t happen, we’re going to go club some baby seals and immediately go buy lottery tickets afterwards.

Doyle Brunson Thinks Anurag Dikshit Is a Dikshit

Doyle Brunson has come out swinging in his latest blog about Party Pokerco-founder and Wicked Chops fave Anurag Dikshit and his $300 million French-like-capitulation to the U.S. American government.

Says Doyle:

"One thing for sure, Anurag Dikshit is appropriately named!  Dikshit was one of the owners of Party Poker and became a multi-billionaire when Party went public.  It looks like he would feel a sense of obligation to online poker, the industry that made him a rich man.  Instead, he folded up like an accordion and plead guilty to breaking some kind of mystery law and is paying a 300 million dollar fine and a possible 2-year jail term.  It certainly created some ill will from the other online poker sites.  I personally can’t imagine what was going through his mind when he made his decision."

Within the online poker industry, most agree that what Dikshit did was extremely dikshitty, and kind of unnecessary too. Maybe Party is trying to put forth an air of (unnecessary) cooperation so if and when there is a poker carve-out from the UIGEA, they are among the first to benefit. Or maybe Dikshit has a couple of wives in the states so he needs to freely travel back here a bunch so he wanted to make sure he wasn't arrested at the gates of JFK like the also unfortunately-named Peter Dicks. Perhaps Dikshit just thought that he was helping fellow poker player Barack Obama by infusing $300 mil into The Economy.

Or maybe Anurag Dikshit is just one big dikshit. Just like Forrest Gump said in his autobiographical movie, Forrest Gump, "My momma once said that once you are a dik-shit, you are al-ways a dik-shit."

Dikshit.

 

 

Dikshit.

Blogger Doyle Brunson To Layne Flack: "Stick It Where The Sun Doesn’t Shine"

We have a lot of respect for old people. They fought wars for us and made it cool to hate the French. And they taught us that if you accumulate enough wealth when you're young, you can still bang hot chicks a third your age when you're old and crapping in your pants.

Anyway, none of that has anything really to do with Doyle Brunson responding to Layne Flack's allegation that he "bought" some of his 10 bracelets in a recent CardPlayer article except for the fact that Doyle is really, really old. Like older than John McCain old. In case you missed it, Flack said the other day:

"You want to talk about buying a bracelet? Let’s talk about Doyle’s bracelet when there were eight people in the tournament...The critics should look back in history and see where a bracelet has been bought."

Giving Flack a verbal middle finger, Brunson fired back on his blog:

"I never won a tournament that had 8 people in it.  There were only 14 entries in a mixed double tournament that Starla Brodie and I won.  If I could find that bracelet, I would sent it to Layne and tell him to stick it where the sun doesn’t shine."

Doyle then gets all wisdom-y saying:

"The 'bracelet race' has become Harrahs and ESPN’s way of making poker interesting and exciting. It is a form of competition and I love anything that is competitive, but winning bracelets has never been high on my priority list. I still play poker because it energizes me and keeps me thinking young. I like playing real poker for real money and tournament poker for me is a second choice."

Perhaps he's got a point. Unlike Phil Hellmuth, it isn't Doyle who goes around touting his bracelet count. It's ESPN, the WSOP and the so-called media who like to talk about it. For Doyle, he's just playing poker to win, whether it's against one table or a field of thousands. 

Speaking of old people, it looks like Jennifer Tilly is our runaway winner of our "Who Would You Rather?" question from yesterday. For some perspective as to how well Tilly has aged, she's a mere 25 years younger than Doyle. Seriously? Who is she, Benjamin Button? Is she going to regress to infant like status when she's Doyle's age? If that's the case, Tilly will be peaking in about 7-8 years. Amazing.

2009 WSOP To Eliminate Rebuy Events? Flack Cracks Doyle? Other WSOP News

The 2009 World Series of Poker may send rebuy events to the rail, according to Communications Director Seth Palanksy.

In an article on Card Player, Palansky says:

"There is a movement to not have any rebuy events...There is the growing concern that a pro can buy a bracelet in a rebuy event."

Surprisingly even guys like Daniel Negreanu, who once rebought 43 times in an event (which he eventually finished 3rd in), agree with this decision.

One guy who doesn't, however, is Layne Flack. "That's bullshit," Flack told Card Player. Flack won the $1,500 Pot Limit Omaha Rebuy event at this year's WSOP. He continued his rant with possibly our favorite quote of the year, cracking on poker's all-time legend:

"You want to talk about buying a bracelet? Let’s talk about Doyle’s bracelet when there were eight people in the tournament...The critics should look back in history and see where a bracelet has been bought."

We've always held a similar opinion, but you rarely hear a pro say it.

In other 2009 WSOP news, Palansky said that they are considering adding a winner-take-all event to the roster. While Palansky told Card Player that they will "likely" keep the Main Event final table delay, we've heard speculation that it will be moved earlier than November next year. While a delay will still occur, most WSOP officials we've learned believe that four months is too long. Look for a final table perhaps in September or October next year. So much for all the work we spent trademarking the clever "November Nine^TM."

 

Not Necessarily Just Poker News Brought to You By Steve Sanders' Wife

Nikki Ziering has aged well. She's on a Jennifer Tilly-esque aging continuum. 37? Wow. View more pics here.

:: This new poker rap is > "Poker is Fun" (not hard) but < "The Poker Rap." [link]

:: Fernanda Ferrari has gotta be a fake name and her boobs have gotta be fake too but ultimately who cares. [link]

:: Dr. Pauly is a professional cooler. [link]

:: Prepare to projectile vomit at the thought of/image of sentence number two of Doyle Brunson's latest blog. [link]

:: Vote for who you're blind shoving with this November...even though they all kind of suck. [link]

:: The greatest insurance video of all time, hands down, nothing even remotely comes close. [link]

:: Lesson learned from Chantel McNulty's plastic surgery: if it ain't broke, don't fix it. [link]

:: The Sarah Palin porno, awesomely titled "Nailin Paylin," is cumming. [link]

Another Poker-Themed Stage Show in Las Vegas Announced. . . Seriously

Doyle Brunson, Daniel Negreanu, Phil Hellmuth, Phil Hellmuth's ego and others to star in new poker-themed stage show at The Venetian.

And to think we thought All In: The Poker Musical was both the beginning and end of poker-themed productions in Las Vegas.

Nope, here comes another, this time from the folks at The Venetian, who just announced it will introduce this fall the "first ever live, interactive poker-themed stage show" called The Real Deal! The show, which is a Vegas-style game show of sorts with prizes, will star poker pros Doyle Brunson, Daniel Negreanu, Phil Hellmuth, Phil Hellmuth's ego, Gavin Smith, Edward James Olmos Eli Elezra, Jennifer Harman, a woman, Phil Laak, Scotty Nguyen, Todd Brunson and Antonio Esfandiari, who magically continues to make himself relevant somehow in the poker world.

Excerpt below from press release explaining how the show will work:

The Real Deal! will empower the audience to participate both on-stage and from their seats through the use of wireless touch screen devices. The Real Deal! will use a revolutionary multi-player platform with interactive content in conjunction with technology from TimePlay Entertainment, Inc. Playing both against and alongside the pros, audience members will earn points to vie for prizes ranging from The Real Deal! logo'd merchandise to spectacular home electronics and more, including a chance to win a $1 million grand prize.

.......

The large collection of prizes will be awarded to individuals based on their game performance, such as their play of the virtual "ninth hand." However, there will be many other random winning moments! For example, audience members will be able to wager on simple instances that will occur during play, such as the suit of cards dealt on the flop. Every show, audience members will also have the chance to draw for a Royal Flush and win ONE MILLION DOLLARS.

An elimination process will result in the chip-leading pro, the final surviving amateur, and the point leader from the play-along audience, on stage for a three-handed finale.

While we wait for someone to dumb this down for us, check out the show's website here.

Unrelatedly, watch RawVegas.tv's new video hostess Brittney Palmer in action here.

We're In The Money

Mike Wattel played the role of bubble boy in the 2008 WSOP H.O.R.S.E. event, busting in 17th place. There's been a number of knock-outs since then, including Doyle Brunson in 16th and Andy Bloch in 15th (earning both $124,320).

At dinner break, 13 remain. Erick Lindgren is chip leader, stacked at 1,790,000. Our perennial pick to win it, Huck Seed, is third with 1,460,000. Scotty Nguyen, Phil Ivey, Barry Greenstein, and Daniel Negreanu are all alive, giving The Year of the Pro^TM a last gasp shot at still being The Year of the Pro^TM.

Get full chip counts here.

DoylesRoom.com Renews Doyle Brunson Sponsorship

There's been some speculation as to why Doyle Brunson (and Todd Brunson) were without DoylesRoom.com logos the first two days of the $50,000 H.O.R.S.E. event at the 2008 WSOP (speculate on the WCP forum here). Even stranger, why were Hoyt Corkins, Dancing with the Stars' Shannon Elizabeth, Sam Grizzle, and others still wearing the logo around? Even stranger, DoylesRoom.com's marketing strategy.

Anyway, Doyle donned the DoylesRoom.net logo again today. Although he doesn't look thrilled about it from the above photo. He could be Glum Girl's grandpa.

All of this speculation though doesn't seem to be impacting Doyle's game, as he's still above averaged stacked. Huck Seed, who happens to be our pick to win it, is currently the chip leader. Follow the action here.

2008 WSOP Update: Erik Seidel Doesn't Win Non-Record 9th Bracelet, Is The Year of the Pro(TM) No Longer The Year of the Pro(TM)?

Isabelle Mercier, a woman pro, is one of the many pros still fighting to ensure that the 2008 WSOP remains The Year of the Pro^TM.

The talk around the Rio Amazon room today among so-called poker "media" and industry types completely surrounds whether or not Erik Seidel and his non-win of Event #43 means that it is no longer The Year of the Pro^TM.^* Or maybe it signals a changing of the tide. Or maybe it's just a blip on the screen, and pros will continue making it the year of them in the last few tourneys before the Main Event starts next week. Like that song from Asia, only time will tell.

:: Event #43 ($1,500 Pot Limit Omaha Hi/Lo) - You've probably figured out by now that Erik Seidel, a pro, did not win Event #43. He finished fourth. A win by Seidel would've all but solidified the 2008 WSOP as The Year of the Pro^TM. A win by Kasey Castle would've at least been a nice consolation, as his hot porn star sounding name gives us a little chubber. Until we see his face. Which then obliterates said chubber. Kastle finished second. Martin Klaser, who is not even a pro, won the event. Further hammering home Klaser's non-pro status is the fact that this is his first ever WSOP cash, let alone bracelet. For the win, Klaser banks $216,249. Get full payouts here.

:: Event #44 ($1,000 No Limit Hold'em w/ Rebuys) - What the fuck is going on here man. We're willing to say that the wildly under-rated Alex Bolotin is a pro, but he's pretty much it at the final table, and he's among the short-stacks, sitting with 308,000. This is Bolotin's third final table of the 2008 WSOP, and for the sake of pros everywhere, he better win. And if not for the pros, than for the sake of The Year of the Pro^TM and all the money we spent trademarking it and dividends we're expecting in return. Jesse Chinni, not a pro, will bring the big stack to final table play with 2,160,000. Get full chip counts here.

:: Event #45 ($50,000 H.O.R.S.E.) - Now we're talking! The leaderboard for this one has more pros on it than a Chinese phonebook. Let's count 'em down: Lyle Berman (pro, 507,000), Patrick Bueno (not a pro, 485,500), Barry Greenstein (such a pro you should count him twice, 473,000), Minh Ly (pro, 451,000), Chris Reslock (pro, 435,500), Joseph Michael (Internet pro and Davidson Matthew Club member, 401,000), Erick Lindgren (pro, 397,500), Justin Bonomo (pro, 384,000), Daniel Negreanu (pro, 374,500), Doyle Brunson (pro, 366,000), and Andy Bloch (pro, 362,500). So counting Barry Greenstein twice, that makes 11 of the top 12 chip leaders in Event #45 pros. That's 91.6%!!! Of the other 49 remaining (counting Greenstein twice still), we'd be willing to bet that at least 80% are pros. And we'd even be willing to count Isabelle Mercier twice (146,000), just because of her fantastic new rack. Get full chip counts here.

Doyle Brunson Dropped From DoylesRoom?

But seriously, why isn't Doyle Brunson wearing any DoylesRoom.net logos for the second day in the row during the $50k buy-in World Championship H.O.R.S.E. event at the 2008 WSOP. Did he get Gowen-ed?

FWIW, we didn't see Todd Brunson patched up either.

Anyone?

Relatedly, Doyle is second in chips late tonight with 301k. Patrick Bueno is living up to his name with a good lead as chipleader, stacked at 416k. James Mackey, a ginger, is third and soulless with 288k.

Chip counts here.

Unrelatedly and ironically, one of the Entities played a tournament today and was seated immediately to the left of this guy. And is still alive.

2008 WSOP Update: Day 2 of Event No. 18 - No-Limit 2-7 Draw Lowball w/ReBuys

The big-name, big-bankroll poker pros in the $5,000 buy-in No-Limit 2-7 Draw Lowball w/ReBuys event at the 2008 WSOP are nearing a final table on Day 2. 18 of the 85 players remain with David Benyamine holding an ironically slim chip lead over a newly slim Mike Matusow, 2007 WSOP POY Tom Schneider of Pokerati fame, and 21-year-old Tom "Durrrr" Dwan. All are over the 400k mark. Others still in include Barry Greenstein, Jeffrey Lisandro, Erick Lindgren, David Grey, Chad Brown, Tony G, Nick Schulman and Michael Binger. Busts before the bubble include Layne Flack (top left photo) and Shawn "Sheiky" Sheikhan (top right photo), and going out just before the money was poker legend and blogger Doyle Brunson. Chip counts here. Click thumbnail for another, better look at what you're looking at above. . .

Doyle Brunson's Top 3 Players, Dead or Fictional, He'd Like to Play Poker With

According to his blog entry today.

One Week Until 2008 WSOP + We're Off Memorial Day Weekend

Barring some crazy breaking story, Wicked Chops Poker will be off Memorial Day Weekend. With the 2008 World Series of Poker just a week away (meaning six straight weeks of unrelenting poker coverage), and 2/3 of the Entities in Ireland right now, and 1/3 of the Entities staggering drunk for three-days, let's be honest, not much is going to get done.

But to get in the mindset for the 2008 WSOP, here's some recommended reading from WCP coverage of WSOP's past.

2005 WSOP
Before going down on Dancing with the Stars' Derek Hough, Dancing with the Stars' Shannon Elizabeth went down in four-way action.
Wily Brit Barry Baskin smelled like shit.
Whatever happened to Johnny Rockets from Daytona? That guy seemed to have the total package.
Brad Garrett was urinating and so dork had an Elmo head.
The longest massage ever?
Some dude got real creepy around Greg Raymer.
Tiffany Williamson...that bitch is crazy!

2006 WSOP
Where to even begin? How about some Card Player Like You Were There Moments (TM) here here here here here here and here.
Phil Hellmuth wins a then record-tying 10th bracelet.
Clearly us at our absolute most bedlam ensuing.
Some chick played in a nun outfit which probably blew Gank's mind.
The Milwaukee's Best Light girls need to make a comeback.
Somebody told us that Bill Gates has a regular call girl he sees in France.
Our Sweats did OK in Day 1B.
Mean people applauded when Doyle Brunson busted.
Our mutual love-affair with Anna Benson began.
Joanna Krupa (above) officially became the hottest girl to ever play the WSOP.
Some more hot girls from the 2006 WSOP.
Vaughn Sandman (where ya been, bud?) absolutely toys with "Salty" Joe Hachem.
We were the first to introduce the world to Jamie Gold.
And we were the only ones to get a pic with Jamie Gold and Crispin "Don't Call Me Bruce" Leyser.

Poker News Looking 'Sexiest' with Megan Fox

Megan Fox, the tattooedly hot actress from Transformers who is bizarrely banging that dude who dated Donna on the show 90210 which your parents' parents used to watch back in the 20th century, has been voted FHM's Sexiest Woman of 2008. The perennially pretty Jessica Alba and our favorite top dropper Keeley Hazell finished 2nd and 3rd, respectively. A bunch of other chicks you'd toss your girlfriend aside for round out the top 100. Check out the list here. Check out Fox looking stunningly hot in various states of undress below. One of the pics btw is of a short Mexican cop on the Sunsent Strip ... see if you can figure out which one it is.

Some sort of newsy poker links for you . . .

:: We aren't the only really goodlooking guys surprised that Doyle Brunson is a blogger (Click here and here)

:: Apparently Phil Hellmuth can't see too well into Guy Laliberte's soul (Click here)

:: We aren't the only poker news-ers who write about Shannon Elizabeth on Dancing with the Stars (Click here)

:: If you live wherever it is WTVY News 4 airs, you should play this poker tournament to support our troops (Click here)

:: License plate poker . . . genius! (Click here)

:: Who dunnit? Poker pro son is suspect in poker pro's father murder (Click here)

:: Friendly poker games won't be legal anytime soon in that state with the palmetto tree and Islamic-y looking crescent moon silhouette logo people annoyingly like to wear all around the south (Click here)

:: Maine's Governor John Baldacci hates charity poker games (Click here)

Jennifer Harman Must Be More Threatening Than We Give Her Credit For...

Apparently many poker pros decided to show up to the  2^nd Annual Jennifer Harman SPCA Charity Poker Tournament in Las Vegas because of the threat of bodily harm. From Jennifer Harman.

Both Phil Ivey and Barry Greenstein alluded to the not-so-thinly veiled threats by Harman as their primary reason for attending the event. However, the prospects of bodily harm turned out to be a good thing for Ivey, as he adopted a sweet little kitty!!!*

Watch the 2^nd Annual Jennifer Harman SPCA Charity Poker Tournament red carpet

* Last time "sweet little kitty" will ever be written on this site unless we're using it as slang for vag.

Doyle Brunson Beer Pong Video

Just days ahead of the $25,000 buy-in WPT World Championship at the Bellagio, some of the biggest names in the game met up with poker legend Doyle Brunson at Hog & Heifers in Las Vegas for a little friendly Beer Pong competition set up by jane-of-all-trades Lara Miller. Among the pros there to lob the pongs while getting soused on the High Life included Todd Brunson, Jen Harman, Hoyt Corkins (at right), Phil Hellmuth, Gank Jungblut, and Marco Traniello.

RawVegas.tv was there to cover the action as Doyle and teammate Hoyt took on his son Todd and some poker dude from Montana. See how they fared in the video below although the screen grab above of Corkins after the match looking totally shit-faced is a bit of a spoiler. By the way, is there a movement to make Beer Pong an Olympic sport? If our Eskimo neighbors to the north were able to get shuffleboarding a rock on ice with a kitchen broom in there, no reason why we shouldn't be giving out gold medals for a skilled sport like Beer Pong.

Watch video on RawVegas.tv here.

Read Jeff Haney's account in the Las Vegas Sun here.

Everyone Thinks Doyle Will Win

The much ballyhooed high-stakes heads-up match between Doyle Brunson and Patrik Antonius is getting nearer, and most everyone we talk to thinks that Texas Dolly has a decided edge. Doyle gets to pick the games, and he will likely stay away from Antonius' specialties: no-limit hold'em and pot limit Omaha.

With 10 games of poker to play at over 7 figures per game, someone could get a major hurting put on them.

Hear what David Williams, Jennifer Harman and Doyle himself have to say about the match in the video below.

Poker News Roundup Brought to You By the Hottest Girl Ever Named Debora

:: Doyle Brunson and Patrik Antonius are closer to going heads-up for millions, on television (Click here)

:: Harvard prof Charles Nesson, aka "Billion Dollar Charlie", rallied against a Massachusetts bill that would make online poker a crime (Click here)

:: Did poker play a role in the double homicide of a poker pro and his wife? (Click here)

:: Did we mention Shannon Elizabeth is on Dancing with the Stars yet? (Click here)

:: PokerNews.com's man-in-charge John Caldwell confirms The Grand is the best poker movie since Rounders, because all the other ones sucked (Click here)

:: The Swedish government is no longer going to prosecute media outlets who publish or air online poker ads from non-Volvoland-based sites (Click here)

:: Congrats to the purported mother of our Brazilian bastard children friend Maria Eduarda Mayrink, aka Maridu, a woman, for finishing 5th out of a field of 500+ at the Rio Poker Fest, winning $40,000 in some type of currency (Click here)

:: The best poker show on television just may be on . . . BET? (Click here)

Photo above of the absurdly stunning Italian model Debora Salvalaggio. Two more pics of the hottest girl ever named Debora after the jump . . .

Doyle Brunson Blogs, Backs Barack Obama, Thinks Britney Spears Is Stupid

Hold up. Wait a minute. Doyle Brunson is writing a blog for the Poker Road? Seriously? Really? Doyle Brunson? A blogger?

Apparently it's true.

In what appears to be his first post, Doyle gets political, voicing his support for political juggernaut Barack "Bam" Obama.

But not before slagging on Britney Spears.

Seriously? Doyle Brunson making fun of Britney Spears? (at right, during hot days)

Apparently it's true.

"During this poker cash game lull, I am on this race for President like stupid is on Britney Spears."

Doyle then continues by saying:

"I have come to the conclusion that poker players have to support Obama...Jennifer Harman and I have emailed Obama and asked what his position is on internet gaming. Hopefully we will get a response from his camp."

Read more on Doyle Brunson's thoughts on Barack Obama and Britney Spears.

* Hat tip to Pokerati

Poker After Dark is Reaching

Apparently running out of good ideas, this week's Poker After Dark on NBC is getting all Brokeback with a Cowboys theme with all six poker players supposedly fond of donning a cowboy hat at the poker table.

The six "gun slingers" are Chris Ferguson, Andy Bloch, Doyle Brunson, Hoyt Corkins, Gabe Kaplan and Chau Giang, who ironically never wears a cowboy hat.

Rumors are a "Lefties Week" and "Straight Male Hairdressers Week" are both in the works.

In related news, not all guys walking around Vegas wearing a Stetson, heavy-starched shirt and Wranglers when the rodeo is in town appreciate it when you say: "Loved ya in Brokeback Mountain, cowboy." Some actually may punch you in the face.

Poker After Dark website here. Shoot them an email and suggest a "poker players who screwed/got screwed by Brandi Hawbaker" week. Or month.

2007 WSOP Tournament Updates: Doyle Doesn't Win 11th Bracelet, Sheikan Leads 2-7 Lowball

Catching up on 2007 WSOP action from the 4th of July holiday...

:: Doyle Brunson did not win a record-tying 11th bracelet. Texas Dolly finished sixth in Event #50 ($10k PLO w/ rebuys), banking $123,967. The event was won by the Grinder's big bro, Robert Mizrachi. For the win, Mizrachi takes home his first bracelet and $768,889. Patrik Antonius finished third ($311,394), but still managed to steal first in the hearts of all the ladies.

:: Dao Bac (at right), who looks like he just smelled a fart, won Event #51 ($1,000 S.H.O.E.), banking $157,975.

:: Ram Vaswani, best known for his golf dispute with Phil Ivey, won Event #53 ($1,500 NLH Shootout). Victor Ramdin finished ninth. Hoyt Corkins was nowhere to be found.

:: And Shawn Sheikan leads Event #54 ($5,000 2-7 Draw Lowball w/ rebuys), stacked at 537,500. He's trailed by Chad Brown, Todd Brunson, and Erik Seidel. Get full chip counts here.

* Photo from Poker News.

Doyle Brunson Goes for 11th WSOP Bracelet Today

Doyle Brunson (at right, napping between hands) may just find that loving feeling for poker again. The poker legend has made his first final table of the 2007 World Series of Poker and is in position today to tie Phil Hellmuth's record 11 WSOP bracelets and possibly bring Hellmuth's ginormous ego down to at least stratospheric levels.

The event is the $10,000 buy-in Pot Limit Omaha event, which if Brunson won would also give the 73-year-old poker legend his first WSOP bracelet ever in a Omaha or Pot Limit event.

Final table play starts up today at 2 pm and Brunson will sit down with 510,000 in chips. Standing in his way as he goes for bracelet number 11 are current big stacks at the table Tommy Ly (1,895,000) and Robert Mizrachi (1,090,000), a player who is more than due to capture his first WSOP bracelet this year after already cashing four times and making two final tables.

Or maybe winning WSOP bracelets just aren't a Brothers Mizrachi thing.

Also at the table are Patrik Antonius (650,000), who may or may not have alopecia, Marco Traniello (420,000), Rene Mouritsen (775,000), Steve Sung (175,000), Stephen Ladowski (360,000) and Jonas "What Kind of Last Name Is" Flug-Entin (445,000).

Keep track of the action today here or waste your day viewing two girls doing Kama Sutra poses here.

Has Doyle Brunson Lost that Loving Feeling?

At least it seems that way in his chat with Tiffany Michelle of PokerNews.com as he talks diplomatically about the crap the Fristian fascists pulled off last October and how that has affected his passion for playing poker.

Check out this video and others from the WPT World Championship over in the PokerNews.com Video Gallery.

Some Seriously Serious Stuff on the Spurious Story of Doyle's Supposed Arrest

Some new guy named "Staff" over at the poker blog Up For Poker just posted a seriously serious commentary on the rise and fall of the Doyle Brunson arrest rumor, entitled Deconstructing Doyle. It's a fair and very smart read, even if it does indirectly point a finger at us because we're SEO whores here at Wicked Chops Poker. Seriously. We're total sluts.

Our only response to the post by this so-called "Staff" guy is that if he's going to alliterate in a headline we think he should go for the gusto with something alliteratively absurd like "Deconstructing the Dish on Doyle's Dubitable Detention" rather than just a two-word pairing that, while alliterative, falls short of encompassing the full breadth and depth of the topic at hand.

Just saying.

Now go read Up for Poker.

Doyle Brunson Not Arrested, Says Gambling911.com

Gambling911.com is confirming that Doyle Brunson was NOT arrested. The no-holds-barred online gambling news site that occasionally makes Wicked Chops Poker look like a site run by Puritans, if Puritans were into half-dress pics of Keeley Hazell, said that Doyle's nurse checked on the poker legend in his Texas home this afternoon and found him there, completely unaware of the rumors of his arrest.

In related news, an amazingly hot girl who happens to share the same name as the mediocre-ly hot Christina Aguilera, but no way can be the same girl because this girl is amazingly hot, did a spread in MAXIM that you should check out here, as a way of celebrating Doyle's non-arrest.

Gambling911.com Calls BS on Rumors of Brunson Bust

If there's another thing we know, all rumors are true unless the rumor is not reported by Gambling911.com, which in that case it may or not be true but more likely it is not than it is, and so when we did not see Gambling911.com reporting on the rumor of Doyle Bruson's arrest, we were left trying to figure out the logic of what we just said.

Well now, the online gambling news site famous for breaking stories and throwing Super Bowl parties in which its reporters get naked and make out with other chicks is calling rumors of Doyle's arrest "a lot of hooey."

According to a spokesperson for DoylesRoom.com who talked to Gambling911.com, "As far as we know, Doyle is at home sleeping in his bed. Don't quote me on any of that but we have someone going over to his house to check on him."

Read the rest of the story over at Gambling911.com.

Photo above of Doyle Brunson, Jenny Woo and some hot chicks courtesy of Gambling911.com.

Rumor: Doyle Brunson Arrested

Doyle Brunson, the 73-year-old poker legend and the man behind online poker site DoylesRoom.com, has been arrested, according to rumors, which if there's one thing we know for certain is that all rumors are true. Whether Brunson was possiby nabbed as part of the Feds ongoing online gaming witch hunt or it's connected to the SEC investigation regarding his unsolicited offer to buy the WPTE back in 2005 or he was busted for jaywalking, or we suppose in his case, jay-scootering, we haven't a clue.

We first came across the rumor over at NeverwinPoker, which someone posted a link in their forum to this forum. We then checked PokerNews.com, which doesn't even mention Doyle's name, and while we were reading that, the addict called over and said Tao of Poker had a bunch of links. Crap, even .Wikipedia has the rumor, so it's got to be true.

Go get you're read on at the links above and stay tuned for the latest here at Wicked Chops Poker.

Photo above is a Wicked Chops Poker shot of Doyle Brunson after he busted out of the 2006 WSOP Main Event.