Things We're Thankful For...

(from our November Bluff Magazinecolumn)

The Wicked Chops Poker Annual “What We’re Thankful For” Article

Every November, sometime right around Thanksgiving, the Entities who comprise Wicked Chops Poker gather around a fireplace and share stories about what we’re most thankful for in our respective lives.

Just kidding. For the most part we take absolutely everything for granted.

Except for poker. Poker has always been there for us. Need an excuse to get away from our current/first wives for a night? Poker. Need some spare coin to help fund covert guerilla wars in developing nations with the hope of spreading democracy abroad? Poker.

With that in mind, here’s this year’s edition of our “What We’re Thankful For” Article.

The 2008 World Series of Poker – This was the fourth WSOP we’ve covered and this was easily and by far our favorite. Huge hats off to Jeffrey Pollack and crew for putting together a well run operation. And while this year may have lacked good Vinnie Vinh chair cashing moments, it did have plenty of big names rising to the occasion, often being railed by girls with even bigger racks.

The 2008 WSOP Rail Birds – See previous paragraph, last sentence. We’ve seen some hot railbirds in the past, but this year’s WSOP set new standards. We even dedicated an entire section of our website (and all but one of the pictures in this article) to these amazing young women.

Sure, people questioned us if snapping photos of girls without their knowledge and posting them on our site was “ethical.” But what are ethics anyway? Ethics are just a system of morals. And what are morals? Morals are the principles or rules that enable you to make the distinction between right and wrong? So then, what exactly is “right?” And what exactly is “wrong?” All we know is if taking pictures of beautiful women and putting them up on the so-called Internet is “wrong,” then we don’t even want to know what “right” is.  

Seriously though those girls were hot. (view them all again here)

Not One Ginger Punched Us in the Face – Not sure what this says about us, but two of our three “What We’re Thankful For” lists have included, “not being punched in the face.”

We had a little fun this year at the expense of gingers. For those who don’t know, gingers are red headed people with freckles, pale skin, and no soul (and actually have the capability of stealing your soul by just looking at you in the eye), like Bluff Magazine Managing Editor Lance Bradley. One of our favorite ginger gimmicks this year was a “Ginger of the Day” feature during the WSOP. For the record, we claim many a ginger as a friend. And we even had some gingers request to be gingers of the day. An overwhelming  number of gingers embraced the Ginger of the Day concept. A few didn’t. Fortunately none of those people took it out on us in the form of physical retaliation. Or by looking at us in the eyes.

Nicknames Coming Through – We certainly have a knack for picking the right people to nickname. From the spectacularly-breasted J.C. Tran continuing his winning ways (and giving us dozens of excuses this year to post photos of him on our site), to “Salty” Joe Hachem being, well, salty, to David “The Dragon” Pham* giving us a chance to asterisk his name more times then we can count, what a year for our stable of nicknames. We can only look forward with eager anticipation to who will get nicknames next year—and what those people will achieve.

Less and Less People Playing on UltimateBet and Absolute Poker – Screw them. They don’t deserve another cent from any of you.**  

The November Nine™ Hostages – Sometimes people get so wrapped up in their own sufferings that they forget about the plight of others. But not the Entities. Those brave souls—The November Nine—who were taken hostage by the World Series of Poker and held captive for four months, unable to access but a minimal amount of their winnings, unable to feed themselves, their families, or put a roof over their heads, they are the real heroes. They are the ones for whom we all owe a deep amount of gratitude.

* Not a real dragon.

** The views expressed by Wicked Chops Poker are not necessarily shared by Bluff Magazine.

Orange Alert: Dan Heimiller, Steve Dannenmann Among WPT Borgata Poker Open Leaders

This can't be good.

Uh oh.

It appears as if someone has woken them up from their post-WSOP slumber.

If the 2008 WSOP hadn't been The Year of the Pro^TM, it very well could've been The Year of the Ginger^TM.

They were everywhere...multiplying faster than Gremlins jumping into a swimming pool.

During the last few days of the Main Event, there were almost more gingers playing than non-gingers. It was out of control.

We admit, we were feeling safe lately. Let our guards down. We even lowered our Threat Assessment from "Orange" to "Blonde" or "Brunnette" even.

Then, seemingly out of nowhere, they've crept up again, and threaten to suck the soul out of all those remaining in the WPT Borgata Poker Open.

With just 27 remaining, Dan Heimiller, a ginger, is the chip leader stacked at 2,870,000 (view Heimiller's Ginger of the Day profile here). Among the 27 left is also Steve Dannenmann, a ginger, with 627,000.

Lots of big names still remain though to halt this orange threat, including Vivek Rajkumar (1,756,000), Thayer Rasmussen (1,413,000), Nick Frangos (1,140,000), Mark Seif (1,087,000), Michael Binger (718,000), Ted Forrest (607,000), Nam Le (235,000), and Chris Bell (165,000).

Brandon Cantu was knocked out in 32nd ($21,000) and Tiffany Michelle cashed in with a 46th place finish ($15,000).

Get full chip counts here.

Catching Up With 2008 WSOP Gingers of the Day

Don't hate on James "mig.com" Mackey. The kid's got game.

We all know that being a ginger is one of the toughest things anyone has to endure in life.

The orange hair. The freckles. The lack of a soul.

While some gingers we featured during the 2008 World Series of Poker have embraced their gingerism, others are just coming to terms with it. (revisit our ginger super-thread here)

Take James "mig.com" Mackey. In a recent $100r tourney on Stars, Mackey was insulted with the following slurs after sucking out with As-9s (posted here on the Pocket 5's thread tilted "I didnt realize people hated gingers so much"):

pykesgoinpro: lol the ginger wins it
BabyGrand [observer]: even a fkn ginger 12 year old can do it
pykesgoinpro: just dont like poepel with aids or gingavitus

On a side note, in the same thread, hats off to poster mathclub for this pmp comment:

"my friend has a ginger brother and sister but he is normal.  talk about dodging bullets."

However, other gingers, like Jon "Pearljammer" Turner (a two-time Ginger of the Day by request) and Super Ginger Cory Albertson have embraced their God-given lack of having a soul.

In his awesomely titled "It's Orange Not Red" blog, Albertson says:

"I take great pride in that my ginger hair, sunglasses, and track jacket were good enough for me to be dubbed the "Super Ginger" of the WSOP. Hey... it's better than nothing!"

Even Last Ginger Standing^TM finalist Sean Davis embraced his inner-ginger with an email to WCP. Maybe hit us up again and we'll ship a t-shirt.

We'll keep tracking the progress of all your favorite gingers in upcoming tournaments. Why? Because someone has to.

Gert Anderson Was Actually The Last Ginger Standing(TM)

Sick.

All right, we prematurely called The Last Ginger Standing^TM not once but twice, mostly because we just wanted to stop writing about those creepy fuckers.

But alas, what's fair is fair, what's right is right, and what's ginger is ginger. So Gert Anderson actually was the The Last Ginger Standing^TM at the 2008 WSOP Main Event.

Congratulations, Gert. You stole approximately 6,800 souls on your quest. Way to go.

Photo credit: WorldSeriesofPoker.com

Like Gremlins They Multiplied

Andrew Bokos is The Last Ginger Standing^TM at the 2008 WSOP.

So Sean Davis is not The Last Ginger Standing^TM.

Maybe it's after midnight and he's been fed. Maybe water got on him. Whatever the case, another ginger has popped up at the 2008 WSOP Main Event. It's Andrew Bokos, a ginger.

Congratulations Andrew. He's currently stacked around 1.4M.

And thanks to reader "Nick" for pointing this out to us. It's readers like Nick that keep people like you safe at night.

Sean Davis Wins The Last Ginger Standing(TM)

This ginger will not steal any more souls, or chips, at the 2008 WSOP Main Event.

After a big time red scare yesterday, we are happy to report that there are no more gingers in the 2008 WSOP Main Event.

Sean Davis, a ginger, was eliminated in 69th place, but before that happened, he earned the trophy of The Last Ginger Standing^TM.

Bravo, Sean. Bravo.

2008 WSOP Day 5: Gingers Flame Out, Hot Girl Goes Deep, Hellmuth Blow Up

Cristian Dragomir The Fragrance (above center) put Phil Hellmuth on mega-tilt, earning the Poker Brat a one-orbit penalty.

What a day at the 2008 WSOP Main Event.

With a ton of notable names coming into play today, the hype/anticipation levels were high. Plus, a bunch of gingers were in contention, as well as some hot girls going deep, and our random pick to win it from the beginning, David "Chino" Rheem, meaning we would have no shortage of stuff to make fun of cover.

When play wrapped, some dude we never heard of whose names sounds like an uppity Brit but is actually an Asian from LA, Mark Ketteringham, ended as chip leader stacked at 5.7M.*

Ketteringham is followed by Andrew Brokos (4,080,000) and our favorite hot girl going deep, Tiffany Michelle, with (3,800,000). Michelle is looking really, really good this year...to win the coveted The Last Woman Standing^TM title, which really is what the girls are playing for...because it's certainly not the Main Event title...because...seriously...have you looked at the history of WSOP results? Are women even trying in the Main Event? Are they even entering it?

In great news for anyone who has a soul, many of the top gingers bowed out of the field today. On the last hand of the night, Mark Vos, a ginger, ran his A-K into Dennis Phillips' A-A, sending what is likely the best hope for gingers around the world to the rail.

Also on the last hand at the featured table, Phil Hellmuth finally had a Hellmuthian Moment (phrase credit: Dr. Pauly) against Cristian Dragomir The Fragrance. Dragomir raised pre-flop, Hellmuth popped him back, and Dragomir made the call. The flop came 10 high, Hellmuth checked and The Fragrance fired. Hellmuth mucked A-K face up. Mike "The Mouth" Matusow, sitting next to Hellmuth, begged The Fragrance to show. The Fragrance turned over 10-4. Hellmuth went ballistic, calling The Fragrance an "idot" and "the worst player in history" (what do you expect, he's a scent!). Hellmuth continued the tirade and was smacked with a one orbit penalty that will take effect when play begins tomorrow.

Anyway that was exhausting to type, so just know that only 79 remain, our pick to win it is still hanging strong with 2.3M, and you can get full chip counts here.

* All chip counts unofficial at post time.

Uh Oh

This isn't cool. At all.

In what we can only assume is an all out assualt on the Entities who comprise Wicked Chops Poker, there are currently two gingers in the top 10 chip counts. In fact, James McManus (above) is chip leader at post time stacked at 3.4M. The other ginger in the top 10 is Mark Vos, a ginger, with just over 2M. Fortunately for all involved that still have a soul, Super Ginger has been eliminated.

Of the hot girls going deep and contending for The Last Woman Standing^TM, Tiffany Michelle, a woman, still leads the pack stacked at 1.7M. Kara Scott, a woman, is at 345,000. In all, a surprisingly high total of five women remain. For this late in any tournament the WSOP Main Event, that's gotta be some sort of record. Probably smashes whatever the old record is, actually.

Mike "The Mouth" Matusow is currently at the featured table with 660,000. Also at 660,000 is Allen Cunningham. Our pick (now to win it) David "Chino" Rheem is at 1,880,000. Cristian Dragomir The Fragrance is still doing well with 2,150,000. Shawn "Bad for Poker" Sheikhan has 1,710,000. And still in the hunt for bracelet #12 is Phil Hellmuth with 610,000.

And we are pleased to report that Deng Dong is still alive with 240,000.

Only 144 remain. Get full chip counts here.

All Right, This Shit is Getting Scary

Ok, they really are multiplying.

We've dubbed this The Year of the Pro^TM and The Year of Hot Girls Going Deep^TM, but the 2008 WSOP Main Event may really be The Year of The Gingers' Revenge^TM.

This is out of control.

First, we have Jon "Pearljammer" Turner, who is so sly in his gingerness he's actually gotten us to like him. He ran it up to over a mil but recently busted.

Then we have the Super Ginger, Cory Albertson. Super Ginger was wearing orange shades, jacket, and was even sitting at an "orange" table yesterday. He's doing well at 640,000.

Next to him is James McManus. James is responsible for sucking the soul out of Positively Fifth Street author, James McManus. See, they're not even the same guy. Creepy. What did he do with the real McManus? We may never know. Ginger McManus is among the big stacks with 1.6M.

Then there's WSOP bracelet winner Mark Vos. With a disposition that some may call "fiery," Vos has been among the chip leaders from the get go, and is currently stacked at 1,115,000.

And it gets worse. Below is a ginger who we don't even know. Plus we saw this guy again. He's still in. And there's more where he came from. Even Johnny Chan is going ginger (although you can't tell with the cap on, but remember, he has red hair). Yes, as we all know, Asians are immune to the ginger gene, but being ginger is so "cool" right now during the 2008 WSOP Main Event, even legends like Chan have decided to "go orange." It's like when Will & Grace and Queer Eye for the Straight Guy were popular in 2003. Everyone followed the trend. Let's just say we did some things that year that we don't talk about. Ever. Fucking trends.

   

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

Our photographer was visibly shaken and turned pale after taking this photo.

Congratulations Jon "Pearljammer" Turner, a ginger, you're our first ever two-time WSOP Ginger of the Day^TM, and you now lead our 2008 WSOP Ginger POY race and are in good position to be The Last Ginger Standing^TM at this year's Main Event. All things that would make you proud . . . if you had a soul.

2008 WSOP Main Event Ginger of the Day

Come on now. Seriously.

Orange-y tinted sun glasses and jacket with orange collar seated at orange table #12. This guy was asking for it. He might as well have worn a sign that said, "Hey Wicked Chops Poker, Look at Me!!! Pick Me as Your Ginger of the Day!!!"

2008 WSOP Main Event Ginger of the Day

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

We said they were multiplying and now they have spawned.

Don't let them out of the bag!!!

Ah sick.

2008 WSOP Gingers of the Day

They're multiplying! Like gremlins or something, except way creepier.

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

This one is so gross, we can't post it on our home page.

Click 'continue' . . . if you dare.

2008 WSOP Update: James Mackey, A Ginger, Leads $50k H.O.R.S.E; Erik Seidel Goes for 9th Bracelet Again

David Benyamine (above right), continues his assault on 2008 WSOP POY honors as he's among the chip leaders in the $50,000 H.O.R.S.E. event.

After a few days of downtime, the hype/action/buzz returned to the 2008 WSOP yesterday with the start of the $50,000 H.O.R.S.E. event. The Rio Amazon Room was packed with newly arrived so-called poker "media,"
railbirds, fanboys, and industry types. Action for the H.O.R.S.E. event picks up again today at 3pm.

:: Event #42 ($1,000 Seniors No Limit Hold'em) - Whatever.

:: Event #43 ($1,500 Omaha Hi/Lo) - The big story here is that Erik Seidel is making his second run at bracelet #9 this year. Seidel is stacked second overall with 340,000. He only trails Jon Maren (377,000), who you've likely discerned then must be the chip leader. Also in contention is Casey Kastle (188,000), who joins Shannon Shorr as the two dudes on the circuit with the best hot porn star sounding names. Let's just say if we saw a DVD called "Girl-Girl-Guy Threesomes Galore! (43)" starring Casey Kastle, Shannon Shorr, and Brock Parker, we probably wouldn't even do a double-take. Get full chip counts here.

:: Event #44 ($1,000 No Limit Hold'em w/ Rebuys) - 115 remain of the original 879, and with all the rebuys, first place with pay $693,444. Jamel Maistriaux ended Day 1 as chip leader, stacked at 169,300. Big name big stacks remaining include Mark Seif (133,000), Joe Tehan, whose name sounds too much like "Tehran" for our liking (108,200), and the spectacularly-breasted J.C. Tran (54,900). Get full chip counts here.

:: Event #45 ($50,000 H.O.R.S.E) - The big one. The event everyone was waiting for and the title the pros most want to claim. Each table is stacked with a who's who of poker greats. Surely the event will continue the trend this year that we exclusively trademarked as The Year of the Pro^TM. Frightening the competition with fearlessness that could only be accomplished by someone lacking a soul is James "mig dot com" Mackey, a ginger, with 214,000. With 140 of the initial 148 remaining, and with virtually every person in the field someone that you've heard of, it'd be, as Dr. Pauly would say, "redunkulous" to list all the notables. But we will mention that Phil Hellmuth, seen here talking about the bad WSOP he's having right before the event began, was one of the eight eliminated on Day 1. Also, the four pros most likely to claim 2008 WSOP POY honors (and solidify this year as the Year of the Pro), Erick Lindgren, Daniel Negreanu, Barry Greenstein, and David Benyamine, are all above averaged stacked going into Day 2. Get full chip counts here.

After the jump, a photo of the fantastically stacked and looking-better-than-ever Isabelle Mercier next to Dario Minieri. Mercier seriously looks like that hot teacher everyone wanted to bang in 9th grade and Dario like the student who gets a little too nervous around her. Also after the jump is possibly the best photo we've ever taken of Tom Schneider.

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

This may be the last of our 2008 WSOP Gingers of the Day. At least it will be if this guy ever sees his photo on our site. Because we're pretty sure he could/would kill us.

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

Scientist have confirmed that male pattern baldness, like gingervitis, is a recessive gene.

They've also confirmed that gingers have no souls and are creepy, even when they lose their ginger hair.

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

Sick

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

Ahh yuck!

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

Ahhhh!!!!!

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

Ewww! [Shiver]

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

Ah!!!

Get Carrot Top's pubes off your face!

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

Usually gingers creep us the fuck out but Jennifer Tilly as a ginger kind of turns us on. Internally it's causing this weird dynamic where the mind is terrified but the penis has stood up and is now smiling.

Tilly's change of hair color is supposedly for a movie role. Must be a horror flick.

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

We're kind of confused on this one because everyone knows that the Asian gene is immune to gingervitis. But somehow Johnny Chan has red hair. How is this possible? It defies science.

Past "Gingers of the Day" here, here, here and here.

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

Jordan Rich, a ginger, is arguably the hottest ginger on the poker circuit right now.

This would probably make Jordan happy to know...except...HE HAS NO SOUL.

AH!!!

2008 WSOP Update: Battle of the Trans + Will Durrrr Capture First Bracelet?

Just a sick amount of tournament action going on. Here's the round-up:

:: Event #5 ($1,000 NLH + rebuys) - Michael Banducci snags his first WSOP bracelet in one of our favorite events. He defeated Jeff Williams for the title and banks $636,736 for the win. WSOP cashing machine Michael Binger went out in seventh. Get full final table results here.

:: Event #6 ($1,500 Omaha Hi/Lo) - Bracelet goes to Thang Luu. This is his first WSOP bracelet and fourth overall cash. He outlasted a field of 832 and a final table that included the Intense Stare of Scott Clements to bank $243,342. The aforementioned Intense Stare of Scott Clements was first to bust from the final table, uhhh, just as we predicted. Get full results here.

:: Event #7 ($2,000 NLH) - Theo Tran continues what could be an early run at 2008 WSOP Player of the Year honors as he takes the chip lead into the Event #7 final table. Tran is stacked at 1,884,000. He's followed by Mihai Manole with 1,020,000. Also in the hunt, albeit as one of the short-stacks, is the spectacularly-breasted J.C. Tran (above) with 273,000. One of the best hold'em tournament players in the world, Tran has yet to win his first WSOP bracelet. Get full final table chip counts here.

:: Event #8 ($10,000 Mixed) - Another star-studded final table. Matt Glantz is the chip leader stacked at 1,150,000. He's followed by 2007 WSOP bracelet winner and former Ginger of the Day James 'mig.com' Mackey with 742,000. Tom "durrrr" Dwan makes a run at his first bracelet as he's third overall with 642,000. Also in contention are Sam Farha (374,000), Jeff Madsen (149,000), and Eli Elezra (76,000). First place here pays out $483,680. Follow the final table here starting at 4pm PST.

:: Event #9 ($1,500 NLH Six-Handed) - Only 72 remain from the initial starting field of 1,236. First place will nab $372,843. Matt Matros is chip leader stacked at 156,600. Other notables include no one really. Get full chip counts here.

:: Event #10 ($2,500 Omaha/Seven Card Stud Hi-Low-8 or Better) - Speaking of gingers, Jordan Rich, a ginger, leads Event #10 at the end of Day 1. He's stacked at 45,800. Other big name big stacks include Michael "The Grinder" Mizrachi (35,600), James Van Alstyne (35,100), Steve Zolotow (35,000), Todd Brunson (31,300), "Miami" John Cernuto (30,000), "Boston" Alan Boston, and Howard Lederer (27,900). They're all playing for a $232,911 first prize.

2008 WSOP Band of Bloggers: Get full recaps and payouts from WorldSeriesofPoker.com here. Get Dr. Pauly's take on WSOP happenings here. Gary Wise has some thoughts here. Please please don't forget Pokerati here. And get Poker Prof's recap and more photos here.

* Get more of the spectacularly-breasted J.C. Tran, slyly going by pen-name Elin Grindemyer, here.

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

Ah!!!!! [shiver]

2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day

We couldn't help but notice on the fantastic Poker Crack forum that an interesting topic broke out on the "Ask Mark Vos" thread. Specifically, poster Harley asked Vos, "What is it like to have red hair."

Vos replied: "It's kinda like being unfunny and a little bit overweight like yourself Harley... except without the ridicule and girls not sleeping with you."

We assume that this is all in good spirit, and we have nothing but mad respect for Mark Vos and his game. But he is a ginger, which means he has no soul, so as poster red+black warned: "Mark's time will come: 2008 WSOP Ginger of the Day."

Good call, red+black. The above photo is of Mark Vos, a ginger, playing a cash game in the Rio Amazon Room this morning with his laptop by his side, likely checking the Poker Crack forum.

Ah!!!

* Editor's Note: For those of you who have bumped into us in the hallway asking what exactly a ginger is, watch this or the full Ginger Kids episode here.